so very sorry to hear about your father. I wish there was some way you could do something, but I know how stubborn people can be. Fortunately for me, when i was being stubborn during radiation, my boyfriend was big enough to just pick me up and drag me there. I was so darn mad at him and crying the whole way there and back and pretty upset for a few days, but shortly after i was happy he did it.
I know foul smell comes with infection and rotting/necrotic(dying) flesh, not sure about cancer, as mine was on my tongue, and i never smelled anything foul.
I sure hope that this is all over soon for him as he is refusing any medical help. It's not fair for you all to have to watch this, and I wish there was a way of just calling 911 and them making him go in, or maybe getting a doc to do a house call and having several family members there to hold him down, or what not, but sadly, that's not an option.
I know there was a story quite some time ago about a family who's son was diagnosed and cuz of their beliefs he wasn't going to go through with treatment, but because he was a child, the state could force him to, and his mother and the child were arrested and brought back for treatment when they fled the state, but unfortunately that can't be done with everyone!

I hope that the suffering will be over soon for everyone in your family and your father. There isn't really any way for any of us on here really to say how much longer he has or what it really is that is going on with him, his emotional and physical symptoms can be caused from many things, and aren't always tied in with the dying process.
I am a cna and have been for almost 3 years now and before that worked in group homes since 03, and have lots of experience helping people that were actively dieing, and no two people go through all the same issues when dying, so it's very tough to say how much longer you have with him. I guess just try to make the best of what time you do have with him, and when he does pass remember the good memories!


25/female at diagnosis
Dx;stage 3 SCC tongue 03/25/2010
Surgery 04/13/2010
Trach,ng tube, peg feeding tube
Hemiglossectomy, right side neck dissection, 40 lymph nodes removed. Free-Flap transplant to tongue.
30 rounds IMRT ended July 15,2010