Charm - thanks for the PM and this note - it really helps to try and put all of this into perspective for us.. I think my dad did mention to my mom he wanted to go to Holland for this reason and I do think he feels like he does not want to leave all of us behind and would like to see his grandchildren grow up.. and has not come to terms with his condition.. and is looking for some way out of this.. We will have the surgeon have a candid conversation with him about the gory details he may endure IF he even makes it through the surgey. Again, thanks for the additional info and links. Dawn