dacidcpa - thanks for the advice and websites and agree we should look forward not "what if" it to death... As a I mentioned in reply to Eric - Dad is not the greatest patient and maybe a second opinion would help us all ... how does one go about getting a second opinion?

My Dad - 85 yrs old; 9/09 diagnosed T3NOMO; rad/low dose chemo; all clear; 6/10 - L retomolar trigone; more chemo; seems to have shrunk; 10/2010 back - significant ulcerative mass in the left retromolar trigone extending into the left tonsil