Cooking,

it's heart-breaking to go through this no matter what your circumstances are, but to do it while raising young kids (I was diagnosed at 38, a little over a year ago, and have three kids - the twins were 6, and the oldest was 10 at the time). My little ones knew that I had to have a surgery because I had "a hole in my tongue" (that's a medical term ! ), and the older one didn't know much more. They still don't. They saw how scary I looked when I got home from the hospital nearly two weeks after the surgery wrapped in gauze, with feeding tube hanging out of my nose, unable to speak and eat, they saw how sick I was during treatment, and that's more than they should handle already.

Now, I look fine, I eat fine, I speak fine (can't roll my Russian Rs, but that's my biggest problem for now, thank god), and we're over the scary stuff. For now. I know that I'm always one visit away from getting on the same rollercoaster, but my kids don't need to know that.

Just do what your gut tells about talking to your kids, but they are at a very impressionable age, and I am pretty sure your 10-yr old can google as well as anyone, so keep that in perspective. They will internalize a lot, and project a lot. It's all very individual. I think the way we handled it worked for us. My oldest knew I was going through radiation (didn't know much about chemo), but he was too young to know what that's for. Had I said cancer, it would have devastated him.

I also met a mother of my kids' friend who is a psychologist, and she was all - you must tell them everything because they need to be prepared if you die. Um... NO!

I know I'm rambling. But there is no right and wrong here. Just don't jump to conclusions and don't scare them earlier than necessary, that's all.

Million hugs to you. I hope everything goes well with you.