Danae

So sorry you had to find our little club, but EricS is "spot on" with his post. The shock of the tongue cancer coming back after you went thru so much pain the first TX is very depressing. Being unable to swallow or eat is not much of mood elevator either. Still, your brother can and will adjust. I'm 5'11" and when the hospital was done with me the second time with all the surgery and flap issues, I was only 119 pounds, and almost a year later I am only 134 pounds. Yet my son and I just spent 4 hours shoveling out our driveway from 24 inches of snow, helping a neighbor chain saw his tree which had toppled into our driveway and then hauling that to the snow bank curb, and digging out another 15 feet of street so hopefully the plow will swing bye. And did all this with my PEG tube tucked into my underwear.
It's only because your brother does not know just how mundane and common what he feels are unique tragedies to him really are for many of us here at OCF. And yes, there is most definitely hope of talking and drinking BUT your brother will not only have to see a speech therapist, but also practice daily at home the exercises. No reason on earth why he can't be back on the golf course. (although EricS is right, golf is not my cup of tea). Plus you did not say how old your brother was, but I am 62 and I bounced back. So it's okay to think and hope about his recovery also.
Keep the faith and please let your brother know that he is not only not alone, but taking a difficult path many of us have travelled. Life is still good , just different.
Charm