Hi susan
i am sorry for your situation and for your mums condition.there is no real easy answer to your question i am afraid ,except to say your priority needs to be her pain management.Caring for her a home may be doable but i would take advice on that as there maybe issues regarding her airway and her pain control,has she been referred to hospice and do you have a specialist palliatve care doctor?


Liz in the UK

Husband Robin aged 44 years Dx 8th Dec 2006 poorly differentiated SCC tongue with met to neck T1N2cM0 Surgery and Radiation.Finished TX April 2007
Recurrence June/07 died July 29th/07.

Never take your eye off the ball, it may just smack you in the mouth.