Cheryl
The easy answer is that there is no normal,and your husbands neck dissection so far has been far from most accepted normals.Firstly you need to blow off the idiot nurse who made such a ridiculous statement,and secondly you need to see your specialist as soon as and get some explanation for his problems.This should involve doing more tests and he needs to see a nutritionist with a view to having his peg replaced asap..the one thing he cant afford to do is lose weight and struggle with his strength and energy levels.The wheezing could be caused by a few things and he should have a chest x-ray at the very least.Problems can get away from you very quickly so i would start shouting.
love liz