Hello all.
I'm sorry to even have to say this, but my love is gone. Doug passed away at 5:22 am march 20th.
I am beside myself with grief and pain. Not only did I lose my love, I lost his family because of religion and his life insurance because no matter how hard I tried Doug would not tend to end of life details. His life insurance was left in his ex wife's name for over 15 years'! I know he never meant for any of this to happen but it did!
Grief and anger come in waves and I don't know how to handle it all.

If I could say one thing to the sick- Please please, it's not giving up by making sure everything is in order for your loved ones. Losing you would be pain enough, let alone lose everything you worked for. And please let all of your family know your last wishes, don't leave your loved one fighting for what your wishes were like my husband did.
Grieving is so awful, anger and loss only amplifies your loss.

At times my pain is so great I don't think I could take another breath. There are moments I pray he is up there seeing what anguish he left me with and more often than not I pray he never sees the pain.