The neck dissection while sounding daunting actually isn't that bad. At least I didn't find it to be that way. I mean you look horrific for a week or so (depending on how they stitch you up - mine used hidden stitches, some have been given staples etc... you will have a few drains in for a day or two and then a dressing for a few more days. My surgery was 14 hours as they grafted my tongue and removed nodes. I was in the hospital for 10 days went home and ten days later I went to mexico for a week. Came back and got my pathology report, then a little less than three weeks later I was in radiation.

So if everything goes okay with your path, and they say no more treatment required that nov. trip could happen. If they say they want you to do further treatment, then chances are it is a 5 -6 week wait for healing then into treatment. That's a reasonable time line.

Now I said let your wife stay home, only because it would be a hardship for her traveling. Don't make her stay home - unless she wants too. If she is insistent in coming then that's okay as long as you can find a place for her to stay. Unless there are complications you will not be in for long 3-5 days? You will be a bit swollen, and definitely numb from the surgery, but you will be okay. You will likely have weakness in your arm on the operative side but you can start physio on that right away and to be honest, I was functional - able to dress and shower, etc.... good luck