Dear all,

My father had a surgery 3 weeks ago of Stage II mouth cancer (cancer was under his tonque) - part of the tonque was removed, all teeth were removed, some lymphnodes were removed. All clear was stated with no need of further treatment (no radiation, chemo), only follow ups in every month in the beginning. He can talk quite understandably and eat soft food.

My concern is that prior the diagnosis he used to drink around 7-8 bottles of beer a day and was very heavy smoker (3 packages a day)

I talked to my mother and found out that he already started smoking again (not much at the moment, but still), no beer yet, but I am afraid it is just a matter of time.

His excuse was that at the hospital he met many people who had never smoked/drinked and still developed the cancer.

So I will go to visit him on Saturday and would like to talk to him about the dangers of what he is doing to himself.

I was thinking that maybe you could refer me some articles or stories about how this kind of behaviour can make the prognosis worse/"helps" the cancer to reccur and so on.

I have read about Sigmund Freud, but maybe there is something else you think I could use to persuade my father about the importance of his own actions.

Thank you
Jaanika

Jaanika,

Please go to this blog site and read it carefully and look at the pictures. Try to show it to your father.

Rich's Plea

This is what happens if he continues to smoke after being diagnosed with oral cancer. It will probably recur.

In the US there are nicotine replacements (patches, gum, mints) that help some with nicotine withdrawal. Nicotine is not one of the carcinogens found in cigarettes, but it is the addictive substance that must be dealt with. There are also prescription drugs available here through a doctor such as Chantix which may give him the support he needs to stop smoking.

BUT...HE MUST STOP SMOKING! Drinking is a secondary concern.

HE CAN DO IT!!! Many people here have.

Best of luck in helping your father.

Jaanika,

You know, the most important thing that all three of my husband's dr.'s said is that he can NEVER start smoking again. The problem is that smoking changes the DNA in one's oral cavity,(for one)along with everywhere else. With having had cancer, he will always be suseptable to another cancer, and smoking will just multiply his chances of getting it back again. He probably feels, what-the-heck, I have it, so why stop now when it is going to get me anyway. This may sound crude to you, but as someone who smoked for most of my life, I fully understand how he is feeling. I will pray for you and your Dad.

I can't remember one person ever on this site that went through treatment and continued to smoke and didn't die. Most, if not all, succumbed within a year or so post Tx and if you read some of their Caregiver's post, this is a horrible way to die.

We have discussed this topic often on this site and we all know that the addiction can be extremely tough for some to conquer, in spite of what's at risk, but it must first start with his desire to quit. If he just plain doesn't see the need to quit then no amount of talking or screaming or jumping up and down will probably make any difference.

Good luck.

I am surprised that David didn't mention this but today many new oral cancer patients, who never smoked or drank had HPV as a causitive factor, so your father is under a misconception about the cause of his cancer which is more likely caused years of smoking and excessive drinking.

In any case, the possibility of recurrence is much higher, whatever the original cause of the cancer, if smoking and/or drinking are continued post treatment.

Being a former alcoholic myself I can tell you that drinking 7 bottles of beer a day is alcoholic drinking.

Wow...those pictures in that blog are hard to look at.

Jaanika,
I know you wish you could do something but the bottom line is, you can't force a person to do something. He has to WANT to. My husband smokes...I have cancer, his father has cancer and his aunt and my unlce just died from cancer....and...he still smokes. I am so sorry for what you are dealing with and I hope for your sake and your family, he quits.