| | Joined: Jul 2007 Posts: 211 Gold Member (200+ posts) |  Gold Member (200+ posts)
Joined: Jul 2007 Posts: 211 | My husband's best friend just died of pancreatic cancer (he lived 17 months after diagnosis basically because he was so healthy when he was diagnosed). He was a non-smoker and light drinker. He was diagnosed a week before my husband was diagnosed with H and N cancer. I am really mixed about continuing to smoke when you have cancer. My sister-in-law (early 40's) was a heavy smoker and got lung cancer. She continued to smoke until about a week before her death. Maybe she thought it wouldn't make any difference in the cancer outcome and that she needed what smoking gave her just to cope. I do know that her children and husband felt really angry about her smoking and felt that she put her addiction to cigarettes above her feelings for them. They didn't know what to make of it- did she feel hopeless? Invulnerable? But in their eyes it will always be the cigarettes that defined her death which is sad.
Last edited by Sophie H.; 01-08-2009 05:28 PM.
Sophie T.
CG to husband: SCC Stage 4, T4, N1, M0; non-smoker and very light social drinker; HPV+
induction chemo begun 7/07; chemo/radiation ended 10/10, first cat scan clear; scan on 5/9/08 clear, scan on 10/08 clear; scan 1/09 clear; scan 1/10 clear; passed away July 2, 2016
| | | | | Joined: Aug 2008 Posts: 716 "Above & Beyond" Member (500+ posts) | | "Above & Beyond" Member (500+ posts)
Joined: Aug 2008 Posts: 716 | A lot of members of my family smoke...nothing will make them stop. Smoking has to be one of the hardest habits to quit. It never appealed to me, smoking does not smell or taste good to me. I still remember that cigarette smell on my grandmothers hands when she would hug and kiss me....yuck.
7-16-08 age 37@Dx, T3N0M0 SCC 4.778cm tumor, left side of oral tongue, non smoker, casual drinker, I am the 4th in my family to have H&N cancer
8-13-08 left neck dissection and 40% of tongue removed, submandibular salivary gland & 14 nodes clean, no chemo, IMRTx35
11-4-08 Recovering & feeling better
| | | | | Joined: Aug 2008 Posts: 531 "Above & Beyond" Member (500+ posts) | | "Above & Beyond" Member (500+ posts)
Joined: Aug 2008 Posts: 531 | Ray I am like you a lot of my family members smoke...except my parents and my side of the family...but my kids, husband and close friends all smoke that is how I met most of my friends in smoking areas where we were shipped off to to have a smoke. Smokers seemed to bond quickly lol....but now I have quit and it is quite different feeling for me...and really not all that easy
Dianne..treatment at cc at Victoria Hospital, London, Ontario...insulin dependant, Surgery Sept 8/08 Tracheotomy,composite resection and bilateral neck dissection, left radial forearm free flap... T2N0 squamous cell carcinoma. No radiation A little over 2 yrs clear YAY
| | | | | Joined: Jun 2007 Posts: 5,260 Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts) | | Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts)
Joined: Jun 2007 Posts: 5,260 | I have made my 1st year of being smoke free. My lungs feel better, body and clothes smell much better . The only thing that bothers me about smoke is the smell. Let em smoke and learn I guess. They sure won't listen.
Since posting this. UPMC, Pittsburgh, Oct 2011 until Jan. I averaged about 2 to 3 surgeries a week there. w Can't have jaw made as bone is deteroriating steaily that is left in jaw. Mersa is to blame. Feeding tube . Had trach for 4mos. Got it out April.
--- Passed away 5/14/14, will be greatly missed by everyone here
| | | | | Joined: Jun 2008 Posts: 309 Platinum Member (300+ posts) | | Platinum Member (300+ posts)
Joined: Jun 2008 Posts: 309 | i too was moved by swayze's interview. you can see the toll it has taken on him, yet his eyes still show he is very much alive ... i wish them the best and for as long as possible.
i think when someone has a treatable cancer and they still continue to smoke, then they are T Totally stupid - plain and simple. They are putting the nails in their own coffin when they have a chance to prolong life and with quality too ... but if some is in last stages when it is found and doc says this is it ... then I can understand someone holding on to their habits as this will be their coping mechanism and chances are stopping will not change anything....
of course family members will have a hard time with it because they are not living the reality in the same manner as the patient and they think in the terms of IF ONLY and MAYBE IF ... but the patient is the one who feels the need to have the vise to make it thru the mental part of the trip they are on ... so i can see why they do it, even if not good. Quitting is hard when healthy - think of trying when they tell you, you have 6-12 months to live ... that would be tough and you would think WHY QUIT NOW ?>??
Rita - Age 44
wife, mother of 4 - ages 3,16,21,24 & grandma to 1
(R upper) Maxillectomy 8/8/08 - UW / Seattle, WA.
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"Those who think by the inch and speak by the yard, should be kicked by the foot."
| | | | | Joined: Apr 2005 Posts: 2,219 Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts) | | Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts)
Joined: Apr 2005 Posts: 2,219 | Some listen, so I never give up trying. After I question a smoking patient if the "want" to stop, I give them the resources and reasons to help them stop.
About 2 weeks ago a young man, who happens to be the son and brother of two of my employees, came in smiling to have me check his cheeks. I had been after him for about a year to stop chewing and he finally did. He had been watching the corrugated look of his tissues changing back to a normal, healthy pink color and he was very proud of himself.
I have to say, this is one of the most rewarding things that can happen to me.
Jerry
Jerry
Retired Dentist, 59 years old at diagnosis. SCC of the left lateral border of the tongue (Stage I). Partial glossectomy and 30 nodes removed, 4/6/05. Nodes all clear. No chemo no radiation 18 year survivor.
"Whatever doesn't kill me, makes me stronger"
| | | | | Joined: Jun 2007 Posts: 10,507 Likes: 7 Administrator, Director of Patient Support Services Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts) | | Administrator, Director of Patient Support Services Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts)
Joined: Jun 2007 Posts: 10,507 Likes: 7 | I wish I had been able to see the Swayzee interview. Sounds like I missed a good program. Did he mention what his lastest prognosis is? Im interested in if he is one of the very few lucky ones who can beat that type of cancer, sure hope so.
I worked with a girl who wasnt so lucky. She was mid 30s and diagnosed around the same time as I was. Poor thing was Stage 4, she died shortly after she went thru treatments unsuccessfully. Very sad for somebody who was so full of life.
ChristineSCC 6/15/07 L chk & by L molar both Stag I, age44 2x cispltn-35 IMRT end 9/27/07 -65 lbs in 2 mo, no caregvr Clear PET 1/08 4/4/08 recur L chk Stag I surg 4/16/08 clr marg 215 HBO dives 3/09 teeth out, trismus 7/2/09 recur, Stg IV 8/24/09 trach, ND, mandiblctmy 3wks medicly inducd coma 2 mo xtended hospital stay, ICU & burn unit PICC line IV antibx 8 mo 10/4/10, 2/14/11 reconst surg OC 3x in 3 years very happy to be alive  | | | | | Joined: Nov 2005 Posts: 1,128 Patient Advocate (1000+ posts) | | Patient Advocate (1000+ posts)
Joined: Nov 2005 Posts: 1,128 | [quote]but my kids, husband and close friends all smoke that is how I met most of my friends in smoking areas where we were shipped off to to have a smoke. Smokers seemed to bond quickly lol....but now I have quit and it is quite different feeling for me...and really not all that easy [/quote]
Addicts tend to surround themselves with other addicts -- The result is that what they are doing is "normal" because everyone around them is doing it! That's also why it can be very hard to dump an addiction because it also means a lifestyle change, not just chemistry!
I first noticed that when I was working with a bunch of retired military alcoholics in Germany, where most of the new hires were alcoholics chosen by an alcoholic
Age 67 1/2
Ventral Tongue SCC T2N0M0G1 10/05
Anterior Tongue SCC T2N0M0G2 6/08
Base of Tongue SCC T2N0M0G2 12/08
Three partial glossectomy (10/05,11/05,6/08), PEG, 37 XRT 66.6 Gy 1/06
Neck dissection, trach, PEG & forearm free flap (6/08)
Total glossectomy, trach, PEG & thigh free flap (12/08)
On August 21, 2010 at 9:20 am, Pete went off to play with the ratties in the sky.
| | | | | Joined: Jun 2007 Posts: 10,507 Likes: 7 Administrator, Director of Patient Support Services Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts) | | Administrator, Director of Patient Support Services Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts)
Joined: Jun 2007 Posts: 10,507 Likes: 7 | Im a former smoker myself, 20+ years with several breaks of up to 1 year of being a non smoker. It wasnt easy to quit, but mindest is a major factor in success or failure.
Between running around to appointments, the recent cancer diagnosis and concern for my children, my stress level hit a new all time high. Internally I felt such guilt and overwhelming remorse that I killed myself and my children would be left without a mother to raise them. There was no one else at all. Then the anger set in and I threw them right out the window and never smoked again. It was not easy at all. I was not about to let cancer get the best of me when I did have some control over that part of my illness. My attitude was its the cigs or its me and the cigs arent going to win, it was a choice and it was my choice!
ChristineSCC 6/15/07 L chk & by L molar both Stag I, age44 2x cispltn-35 IMRT end 9/27/07 -65 lbs in 2 mo, no caregvr Clear PET 1/08 4/4/08 recur L chk Stag I surg 4/16/08 clr marg 215 HBO dives 3/09 teeth out, trismus 7/2/09 recur, Stg IV 8/24/09 trach, ND, mandiblctmy 3wks medicly inducd coma 2 mo xtended hospital stay, ICU & burn unit PICC line IV antibx 8 mo 10/4/10, 2/14/11 reconst surg OC 3x in 3 years very happy to be alive | | | | | Joined: Nov 2002 Posts: 3,552 Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts) | | Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts)
Joined: Nov 2002 Posts: 3,552 | For those of you who missed it, the entire interview is available (in 5 parts) on Youtube. Forget ABC, they are already selling it for 30 bucks... http://www.youtube.com/results?search_query=swayze+interview&search_type=&aq=f
Last edited by Gary; 01-09-2009 06:47 AM.
Gary Allsebrook
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Dx 11/22/02, SCC, 6 x 3 cm Polypoid tumor, rt tonsil, Stage III/IVA, T3N0M0 G1/2
Tx 1/28/03 - 3/19/03, Cisplatin ct x2, IMRT, bilateral, with boost, x35(69.96Gy)
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"You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes" (James 4:14 NIV)
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