#8737 11-04-2006 06:38 PM | Joined: Feb 2006 Posts: 58 Supporting Member (50+ posts) | OP Supporting Member (50+ posts) Joined: Feb 2006 Posts: 58 | Just wanted to let you all know that my Mother passed away today. She went very peacefully. She passed away at the Hospice center. They were all so wonderful in controlling her symptoms. I couldn't of asked for better care. I will miss her very much but I know now that she is in a better place and no longer suffering from this horrible disease, tongue cancer. I have a 6yr old who will miss his Grandma Betty very much.
The hardest part was telling my father. First time I have ever seen him cry. We got him out of the hospital on Wed. to a skilled rehab center just for a few weeks to get his strength back. This is what his doctor ordered. Our next step is to get him home.
It's just so hard to believe that 10 days ago is when we found out that it was the cancer causing all of her symptoms and not the radiation side effects and now she is gone. She fought so hard and never complained about anything. Just always tried to do what the doctors told her and put her faith in them.
I still am so angry at the doctors, how could they have missed this or what went wrong. But I realized that this is not what my mother would want. Thank you all for your prayers and words of kindness.
Michelle | | |
#8738 11-04-2006 07:01 PM | Joined: Apr 2006 Posts: 378 "Above & Beyond" Member (300+ posts) | "Above & Beyond" Member (300+ posts) Joined: Apr 2006 Posts: 378 | I am very sorry to hear about your Mom but relieved to know that she went peacefully and that Hospice helped. They have bereavement programs that you may find useful as time goes on.
There will be a lot of things for you to focus your energy on between your Dad and caring for your own family. Your Mom has obviously had a tremedous impact on your life. I believe that love does not die and that we always carry a little piece of our loved ones spirit in our hearts.
Everything is going to be a raw nerve right now but I promise you it will get better. Anger is understandable in these circumstances but not comforting and not worth your energy. How wonderful that you were able to share this final passage with your Mom. She is beyond the suffering and at peace. You are her legacy and I know that remembering her will help you find that too.
My deepest sympathy for you and your Dad, and I hope that his recovery goes as expected and that he comes home soon.
Regards JoAnne
JoAnne - Caregiver to husband, cancer rt. tonsil, mets to soft palate, BOT, 7 lymph nodes - T3N2BM0, stage 4. Robotic assisted surgery, radical neck dissection 2/06; 30 IMTX treatments and 4 cycles of cisplatin completed June 06.
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#8739 11-05-2006 01:05 AM | Joined: Oct 2006 Posts: 46 Contributing Member (25+ posts) | Contributing Member (25+ posts) Joined: Oct 2006 Posts: 46 | Michelle,
I, too, send my deepest sympathy to you and your family.
I hope your dad can find some peace and that he recovers from his heart issues soon.
Loretta
C/G to husband SCC of right tonsil, Dx 5/02. Tx concurrent rad with Taxol and Cisplatin. Consolidation therapy Cisplatin and 5-FU. Recurrence 9/06, neck dissection 10/06. Tx with twice daily radiation; two in-patient infusions of Cisplatin.
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#8740 11-05-2006 03:17 AM | Joined: Sep 2006 Posts: 8,311 Senior Patient Advocate Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts) | Senior Patient Advocate Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts) Joined: Sep 2006 Posts: 8,311 | Michelle, we all share in your grief and only wish we could do more than our mere words. Please know we will always be here for you and your dad.
David
Age 58 at Dx, HPV16+ SCC, Stage IV BOT+2 nodes, non smoker, casual drinker, exercise nut, Cisplatin x 3 & concurrent IMRT x 35,(70 Gy), no surgery, no Peg, Tx at Moffitt over Aug 06. Jun 07, back to riding my bike 100 miles a wk. Now doing 12 Spin classes and 60 outdoor miles per wk. Nov 13 completed Hilly Century ride for Cancer, 104 miles, 1st Place in my age group. Apr 2014 & 15, Spun for 9 straight hrs to raise $$ for YMCA's Livestrong Program. Certified Spin Instructor Jun 2014.
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#8741 11-05-2006 03:45 AM | Joined: Sep 2006 Posts: 75 Senior Member (75+ posts) | Senior Member (75+ posts) Joined: Sep 2006 Posts: 75 | Michelle My deepest sympathy, to you and your family. I also would Like to thankyou, for sharing this with us. Knowing your Mom went peacefull has to be a large comfort. Chris
Tongue Cancer, stage 4, spread to neck/ Radical neck, 3 chemos, 33 radiation. 5-18-2005
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#8742 11-05-2006 05:32 AM | Joined: Apr 2006 Posts: 583 "Above & Beyond" Member (500+ posts) | "Above & Beyond" Member (500+ posts) Joined: Apr 2006 Posts: 583 | Michelle,
I know there are not enough words to help take the pain of your loss away. My thoughts are with you and your family. I pray your dad will be home soon.
Take care, Diane
2004 SCC R.tip 1/4 tongue Oct. 2005 R. Neck SCC cancer/Chemo Cisplatin 2x/8wks. Rad. Removed Jugular vein, Lymph gland & some neck muscle. TX finished 1/20/06... B.Cancer 3/29/07 Finished 6/07 Bi-op 7/15/09 SCC in-situ, laser surgery removed from 1st. sight. Right jaw replacement 11/3/14. 9 yrs cancer free as of Jan. 2015
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#8743 11-05-2006 05:45 AM | Joined: Sep 2006 Posts: 493 Platinum Member (300+ posts) | Platinum Member (300+ posts) Joined: Sep 2006 Posts: 493 | I'm sorry for your loss. I wish there was more I could say or do...you are in my thoughts and prayers.
Tim Stoj 60 yr old. Dx Jun 06 with BOT Stage IV. Neck dissesction on 19 Jun 06. Started Tx on 21 Aug 06/completed 33 IMRTs and 3 CT (2 Cisplat & 1 Carboplat) on 5 Oct 06.
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#8744 11-05-2006 08:20 AM | Joined: Apr 2004 Posts: 837 "Above & Beyond" Member (300+ posts) | "Above & Beyond" Member (300+ posts) Joined: Apr 2004 Posts: 837 | Michelle,
I'm so sorry to hear about your mother. I know you've done everything you could to try to help her through the past several months. You and your family will be in my thoughts and prayers.
Cathy
Tongue SCC (T2M0N0), poorly differentiated, diagnosed 3/89, partial glossectomy and neck dissection 4/89, radiation from early June to late August 1989
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#8745 11-05-2006 10:44 AM | Joined: Oct 2006 Posts: 12 Member | Member Joined: Oct 2006 Posts: 12 | I am so sorry for your loss. There is a great country song called holes in the floor of heaven. My daughter found it a great comfort when her great grandmother passed. Your family is in my thoughts and prayers. GOD BLESS YOU Jennifer | | |
#8746 11-05-2006 02:24 PM | Joined: Oct 2006 Posts: 160 Senior Member (100+ posts) | Senior Member (100+ posts) Joined: Oct 2006 Posts: 160 | My most sincere sympathy goes out to you at this time. Your mother was certainly blessed to have a daughter like you. It takes so much inner strength to watch our parents go through sickness and to finally watch them reach peace. You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers. I Wish a speedy recovery for your Dad. Remember to take care of yourself.
Dx3/20/06 SCC,BOT,1N Tx:5cycles Carbo/Taxol, Rad:35x, brachytherapy:6x, completed 7/24/06
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