| Joined: Aug 2008 Posts: 531 "Above & Beyond" Member (500+ posts) | "Above & Beyond" Member (500+ posts) Joined: Aug 2008 Posts: 531 | Well I guess this rings true with a lot of things and Gary you are so right Life is terminal. The day you are born you start to die but it all depends on what you do with it. How you react and deal with what life throws at you. You can lie down and submit or you can fight. Everyone here I have met are fighters and have gone the extra mile. I guess thats why this topic bothers me so much. We didn't choose to have oral cancer and a lot of us never smoked or drank or chewed or anything but are still here. I talked to who used to be my close dear friend last night whom I haven't talked to in a very long time. I told her I had a very hard year and all the events including my fight with oral cancer. The first words out of her mouth were not Are you ok,,,no real concern for me just said well I guess smoking is out...and not what happened or anything...Total blame on me...I was speechless....The conversation went on without any other reference to my cancer...I was hurt!!!
But I guess there are people out there...hmmmm makes you wonder...
Dianne..treatment at cc at Victoria Hospital, London, Ontario...insulin dependant, Surgery Sept 8/08 Tracheotomy,composite resection and bilateral neck dissection, left radial forearm free flap... T2N0 squamous cell carcinoma. No radiation A little over 2 yrs clear YAY
| | | | Joined: Jun 2007 Posts: 5,260 Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts) | Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts) Joined: Jun 2007 Posts: 5,260 | People are more curious about things they don't know about . I think I was asked by my friends the same damn dumb question. Geez, you sit there talking smiling and you hear Are you alright, Hell no. I'm talking to you from the great beyond.
Since posting this. UPMC, Pittsburgh, Oct 2011 until Jan. I averaged about 2 to 3 surgeries a week there. w Can't have jaw made as bone is deteroriating steaily that is left in jaw. Mersa is to blame. Feeding tube . Had trach for 4mos. Got it out April. --- Passed away 5/14/14, will be greatly missed by everyone here
| | | | Joined: May 2008 Posts: 551 "Above & Beyond" Member (500+ posts) | "Above & Beyond" Member (500+ posts) Joined: May 2008 Posts: 551 | Dianne,
About a year after my sister was treated for breast cancer, she received an email from a colleague/acquaintance that said, "So, are you still alive?"
She never answered it.
Stage IV SCC lt lateral tongue, surgery 5/19/08 (partial gloss/upper neck dissection left side/radial free flap reconstruction) IMRT w/weekly Cisplatin & Erbitux 6/30/08, PEG 1 6/12/08 - out 7/14 (in abdominal wall, not stomach), PEG 2 7/23/08 - out 11/20/08, Tx done 8/18/08 Second SCC tumor, Stage 1, rt mobile tongue, removed 10/18/2016, right neck dissection 12/9/2016 Third SCC tumor, diagnosed, 4/19/2108, rt submandibular mass, HPV-, IMRT w/ weekly Cisplatin, 5/9 - 6/25/2018, PEG 3 5/31/2018
| | | | Joined: Aug 2008 Posts: 531 "Above & Beyond" Member (500+ posts) | "Above & Beyond" Member (500+ posts) Joined: Aug 2008 Posts: 531 | I think I am over it but when I see her or hear from her I wish I was as quick witted as a lot of you folks...I think I will try to be straight up and say that hurt cause she talked about dropping in to see me as she lives in the area...guess I always have the other guys back a quality I am not sure is all so good...I will give her the bennefit of the doubt maybe I shocked the hell out of her...and she didn't know what to say but will find out...it only stung for a night...I like to laugh if the joke is funny...folks it just really makes me wonder what goes through some people's minds and/or mouths...
It is them who will eventually miss out on knowing and having the priviledge of know us as survivors!!!
Dianne..treatment at cc at Victoria Hospital, London, Ontario...insulin dependant, Surgery Sept 8/08 Tracheotomy,composite resection and bilateral neck dissection, left radial forearm free flap... T2N0 squamous cell carcinoma. No radiation A little over 2 yrs clear YAY
| | | | Joined: Oct 2008 Posts: 247 Likes: 1 Gold Member (200+ posts) | Gold Member (200+ posts) Joined: Oct 2008 Posts: 247 Likes: 1 | Gary - You mention OC cures coming mainly from prostate cancer research.
Could you please elaborate? Most prostate ca is adenocarcinoma, isn't it? Unfortunetly, my husband has had both, diagnosed one year apart.
Thank you, Lottie
CG to husband, dx @ age 65, nonsmoker/social drinker. Dx 5/08 SCC Stage IV, BOT T1N2aM0. 33 IMRT - completed 9/12/08. Induction Chemo (Cisplatin, Taxotere & 5FU), plus concurrent Cisplatin. 1/09 PEG removed; 5/09 neg PET/CT; 5/10 PET/CT NED Dental extraction & HBOT 2013; ORN 2014; Debridement/Tissue Transfer & HBOT 2016
| | | | Joined: Dec 2008 Posts: 1,004 Patient Advocate (1000+ posts) | Patient Advocate (1000+ posts) Joined: Dec 2008 Posts: 1,004 | People really don't get it. I work with a girl who I mistakenly told my story too. Every time I saw her after that she would say "How Aaaaaare you" you know, she would really drag out the "are" I would say "fine, how are you?" then yet again she would say "i'm good. But really, how are you" I guess people with cancer shouldn't be happy?
I swear, it's like I said "oh...I just ordered my coffin in mahogony. It's gorgeous" LOL I don't talk to her anymore:)
Suzanne *********** T1 SCC on right side of tongue Age 31...27 when diagnosed 4 partial glossectomies No chemo or radiation Biopsy on 2/2/10-Clear Surgery needed again...no later than April 2011 Loving life and just became a mother on 11/25/10 It's not what we CAN'T do..it's what we CAN do:)
| | | | Joined: Aug 2008 Posts: 113 Senior Member (100+ posts) | Senior Member (100+ posts) Joined: Aug 2008 Posts: 113 | I've learned more about people in this last year than I have in my 65 years on this earth.........After Jim got the cancer in his lungs, my sister-in-law sent him literature about dying and going to heaven and "make it right" with God. Imagine that one ? I wasn't offended by the contents of the literature, I just didn't find it appropriate. Needless to say, I did not show it to Jim.
Husband 2/3 tongue removed March 2008. Free flap. . Stage IV. Radiation and 3 chemo's (cisplatin,taxol & erbitux). .Pet scan Aug 08 showed mets to lungs .Oct 08, recurrence. - In the arms of Jesus, July 15, 2009
| | | | Joined: Jul 2008 Posts: 56 Supporting Member (50+ posts) | Supporting Member (50+ posts) Joined: Jul 2008 Posts: 56 | [quote=margaret_in_ma]Dianne,
About a year after my sister was treated for breast cancer, she received an email from a colleague/acquaintance that said, "So, are you still alive?"
She never answered it. [/quote]
Geezus. | | | | Joined: Jun 2007 Posts: 10,507 Likes: 7 Administrator, Director of Patient Support Services Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts) | Administrator, Director of Patient Support Services Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts) Joined: Jun 2007 Posts: 10,507 Likes: 7 | Having cancer really can show you who are true friends. Same can be said about family members. Some people will run away like you are contagious. Then you have the ones who are so inappropriate and act like you will drop dead any second. Im not sure which ones bothered me more.
Its really a shame that people can change so dramatically from being your friend or close family member by someone having a cancer diagnosis. It just goes to show you who you can count on and who you cant, which can be very surprising.
By a close family member I was given literature to read about every type of cancer except what I had. That person proceded to cry everytime they saw me and kept saying how they dont want me to die, like it was my choice. This was overly upsetting as it was done right in front of my children who were already worried enough. Some people have no common decency or sense.
ChristineSCC 6/15/07 L chk & by L molar both Stag I, age44 2x cispltn-35 IMRT end 9/27/07 -65 lbs in 2 mo, no caregvr Clear PET 1/08 4/4/08 recur L chk Stag I surg 4/16/08 clr marg 215 HBO dives 3/09 teeth out, trismus 7/2/09 recur, Stg IV 8/24/09 trach, ND, mandiblctmy 3wks medicly inducd coma 2 mo xtended hospital stay, ICU & burn unit PICC line IV antibx 8 mo 10/4/10, 2/14/11 reconst surg OC 3x in 3 years very happy to be alive | | | | Joined: Aug 2008 Posts: 531 "Above & Beyond" Member (500+ posts) | "Above & Beyond" Member (500+ posts) Joined: Aug 2008 Posts: 531 | This is truly a world of endless possibilities we live in...And it surprises me every time...just when you think you know someone. At least we have a place where we can go to vent and talk to people who do understand and we can laugh at those who are insensitive and lack common decency.
This just prove we gots to stick together!!! Plus it is up to us I guess to become teachers and educators to these people some will learn and some will fall by the wayside.
Dianne..treatment at cc at Victoria Hospital, London, Ontario...insulin dependant, Surgery Sept 8/08 Tracheotomy,composite resection and bilateral neck dissection, left radial forearm free flap... T2N0 squamous cell carcinoma. No radiation A little over 2 yrs clear YAY
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