#7379 04-13-2006 04:05 PM | Joined: Mar 2002 Posts: 4,912 Likes: 52 OCF Founder Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts) | OP  OCF Founder Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts)
Joined: Mar 2002 Posts: 4,912 Likes: 52 | Oral cancer IS NOT uncommon in non-smokers, and it is increasing in under 50 year old non-smokers. A lifelong tobacco habit, even one that terminated several years ago, continues to be a causative agent for a variety of cancers, and other medical problems. At this point you should not beat yourself up about choices you made earlier in our life. The past is behind you and nothing can change what was. Your focus now needs to be on dealing with the cards you are holding and playing the hand that you have the best you can.
Informed choices are the main thing that you can do now. Do not hesitate to question your doctors about everything. It is their job to answer your questions as well as treat you. Your RO may not have been to blame for the question, the surgeon may not have forwarded his records or post-surgical path reports to him. This could have been a timing issue or just sloppy handling of the situation. But clearly, asking you about the size of the tumor removed seems odd. You don't mention what his plans for you are, but what ever, you should understand his direction and have confidence in him as a result of his explanations of your questions. Never hesitate to be your own advocate. It isn't the doctor's life on the line here.
If you were not feeling insecure right now, I would say you were abnormal or lying. All of us are afraid of things from diagnosis on. All you can do is try to keep things in perspective, take it one day at a time, and keep moving forward with the vision of a return to a normal life in your future. That does not mean that any of it will be easy or there will not be days when you don't think you can deal with it all. But those days eventually pass, and you will find the strength, courage, and will to face the next one. Trust in yourself. Trust in the great people on this board to help you when it gets rough.
Brian, stage 4 oral cancer survivor. OCF Founder and Director. The first responsibility of a leader is to define reality. The last is to say thank you. In between, the leader is a servant.
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#7380 04-21-2006 12:40 PM | Joined: May 2005 Posts: 497 "Above & Beyond" Member (300+ posts) | | "Above & Beyond" Member (300+ posts)
Joined: May 2005 Posts: 497 | Awesome. I wish I had been able to read a book like that when I was first diagnosed.
[i]"The artist, a traveler on this earth, leaves behind imperishable traces of his being." -Fran
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#7381 05-04-2006 05:20 PM | Joined: Nov 2005 Posts: 306 Platinum Member (300+ posts) | | Platinum Member (300+ posts)
Joined: Nov 2005 Posts: 306 | Everyone be sure to go to the "Getting Through It" thread (at the bottom of the forum menu) and stay tuned as this project begins to take shape!! Its going to be both challenging and fun! Tom
SCC BOT, mets to neck, T4.
From 3/03: 10wks daily multi-drug chemo,
Then daily chemo with twice daily IMRT for 12 weeks - week on, week off. No surgery. New lung primary 12/07. Searching out tx options.
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#7382 05-05-2006 03:21 PM | Joined: Apr 2005 Posts: 2,676 Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts) | | Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts)
Joined: Apr 2005 Posts: 2,676 | Thank you Tom for taking this on. You are sure to get LOTS of  good advice. Amy
CGtoJohn:SCC Flr of Mouth.Dx 3\05. Surg.4\05.T3NOMO.IMRTx30. Recur Dx 1\06.Surg 2\06. Chemo: 4 Cycles of Carbo\Taxol:on Erbitux for 7 mo. Lost our battle 2-23-07- But not the will to fight this disease
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