#1778 10-08-2003 06:09 AM | Joined: Jul 2002 Posts: 51 Supporting Member (50+ posts) |  Supporting Member (50+ posts)
Joined: Jul 2002 Posts: 51 | I join the other members of the board in expressing my sorrow for your loss. I followed Heather's progress since your first posting. Wishing you you and your family the strength and faith to continue on in Heather's memory. LM | | |
#1779 10-08-2003 10:30 AM | Joined: Jun 2003 Posts: 25 Contributing Member (25+ posts) | | Contributing Member (25+ posts)
Joined: Jun 2003 Posts: 25 | I am so sorry for your loss - I am in the process of losing my mother - She is on a respirator trying to fight an infection from the chemo - It doesn't look good - We will know in about 72 hours - I'm devastated to say the least - I feel your pain - Please know that you are in my thoughts and your family too - You will get through this - Please take care -
Sue | | |
#1780 10-08-2003 04:38 PM | Joined: Mar 2002 Posts: 4,918 Likes: 66 OCF Founder Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts) | | OCF Founder Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts)
Joined: Mar 2002 Posts: 4,918 Likes: 66 | I have been waiting and thinking what to write in response to Rosie's post. Several days have gone by, and the words just don't come. Needless to say I share in the pain associated with Heathers passing. Over the last year we have all come to know both Rosie and Heather through the many posts here. We have all participated in a way in Heather's battle, and in Rosie's fight; we have seen the fears, the pain, the steps forward and backwards, and ultimately had their inner strengths revealed to us. I doubt that any caregiver or any patient is not snapped back into reality by the culmination of their fight, as we all, at least on a subconscious level, can see ourselves in their positions. While what has transpired cannot be changed, what I choose to remember about all of the posts over the last year is the courage with which both mother and daughter approached the fight. It goes without saying that one day all of us will leave this physical existence. We will be remembered by the quality and actions of our lives and their impact on those with whom we came in contact. If this is the true measure of our lives, Rosie and Heather certainly have set that bar high. In spite of her own issues and trials, Rosie has frequently come to the boards to offer support and advice, wrought from her own experiences to new comers, be they caregivers or patients. Her gracious and generous participation in helping others even while in the middle of fighting her own battles reflects her genuine humanity, something that we can all aspire to. She has asked that those that wish to honor Heather
Brian, stage 4 oral cancer survivor. OCF Founder and Director. The first responsibility of a leader is to define reality. The last is to say thank you. In between, the leader is a servant.
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#1781 10-08-2003 05:58 PM | Joined: Nov 2002 Posts: 458 Platinum Member (300+ posts) | | Platinum Member (300+ posts)
Joined: Nov 2002 Posts: 458 | Rosie
So sorry to hear about your loss, my thoughts and prayers are with you during this time.
Bob S.
SCC Tongue, stage IV diagnosed Sept, 2002, 1st radical neck dissection left side in Sept, followed by RAD/Chemo. Discovered spread to right side nodes March 2003, second radical neck dissection April, followed by more RAD/Chemo.
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#1782 10-08-2003 07:03 PM | Joined: May 2003 Posts: 39 Contributing Member (25+ posts) | | Contributing Member (25+ posts)
Joined: May 2003 Posts: 39 | Rosie,
I am so sorry for your loss. Thank you for the love and support you have giver Eric and I. I will honor your wishes for remembering Heather through supporting OCF.
Jack Hovenier
Caregiver to Eric
Squamous Cell Carcinoma, L. Tonsil
Stage 3 (T2-N1-M0)
5 Years Cancer Free Now
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#1783 10-09-2003 02:23 AM | Joined: Mar 2003 Posts: 251 Gold Member (200+ posts) | | Gold Member (200+ posts)
Joined: Mar 2003 Posts: 251 | Rosie,
I"d like to add my condolences for your loss. Often, when I have felt at a low point helping my husband with his struggle with this disease, I have thought of you and taken inspiration from your courage and strength.
Peace,
Anita
Husband Dx 12/02 Stage 4 Tonsil Cancer T1N2bM0; surgery, radiation, chemo 1/03 - 4/03.
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#1784 10-09-2003 10:55 AM | Joined: May 2003 Posts: 102 Gold Member (100+ posts) | | Gold Member (100+ posts)
Joined: May 2003 Posts: 102 | Dearest Rosie,
I feel so very sad to hear of the loss of your beautiful daughter. After reading the news, I simply sat here not knowing what to do or say, almost not being able to move. Please do know that your honest account of Heather's journey has helped all of us who love and support an oral cancer patient. Everyday I pass along the message of being "committed to the fight" to my dear Aunt Ro as she continues to battle her cancer and the aftermath of her treatment. I do know (as I have lost my most favorite love, my Dad) that there will be a tangible void in your days for some time to come, but your daughter will live forever in your heart (and ours) and forever in your dreams- where you will be able to see her and talk to her always. Forgive me, as I am a devout Catholic...... my prayers are that Heather's soul is whisked on angel's wings to Our Father's home in Heaven where she will forever be safe in His loving sight. God Bless you and yours Rosie. Please take good care of yourself as you go through this transition.
With much love,
Lisa Stankus-DeStefano
Niece/almost daughter to Aunt Rosemary (Stage 3/4 Base of Tongue, Floor of Mouth, Salivary Gland, 1 positive lymph node, STILL FIGHTING!)
Niece to Aunt Ro- Dx: 4/03. SCC Stg 4 BOT with mets to fl of mth & crvcl lymph node. AdenoC 1 sal gland. Two add. reconstrc. surgeries for adhesions. Recurrence 7/06- Sub-Mand AdenoC. Mets to both lungs. Lost her battle 5/4/07.
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#1785 10-10-2003 05:04 AM | Joined: Oct 2002 Posts: 546 "Above & Beyond" Member (500+ posts) | | OP "Above & Beyond" Member (500+ posts)
Joined: Oct 2002 Posts: 546 | For those of you who would like to see a picture of Heather before she got cancer............well at least before she knew she had it..........try this link. It is of Heather and her daughter Cati in July 2002.
http://user.pa.net/~vidwiz/MyPictures/heather.JPG
Rosie
Was primary caregiver to my daughter Heather who had stage IV base of tongue SCC w/ primary recurrence. Original diagnosis August 21st, 2002. Primary recurrence March 18th, 2003. Died October 6th, 2003.
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#1786 10-10-2003 05:28 AM | Joined: Aug 2002 Posts: 76 Supporting Member (50+ posts) | | Supporting Member (50+ posts)
Joined: Aug 2002 Posts: 76 | Oh Rosie, what a beautiful picture of Heather and her daughter!! I never saw the pictures you posted of her during her fight with cancer, so it is so hard to believe this beautiful woman is gone. We are all praying for you.
P.S. How are her daughter and husband holding up?
I have two kids 14 and 10 and they had a very hard time during Dan's treatment.
Sherrie
Sherrie wife to Dan, Tonsil cancer survivor, Stage IV diagnosed July/2001
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#1787 10-10-2003 09:02 AM | | Anonymous Unregistered | | Anonymous Unregistered
| Rosie,
Thank you for posting that beautiful picture. That is the one I will keep in my thoughts when I think of Heather.
Please take care of yourself. God Bless.
Dinah | | |
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