Thanks for updating us, David. So good that Linda has you and that you will be getting another opinion. Hope it brings some new more hopeful information.

If Linda will be getting a trach, ask them for a possey muir valve trach so she can easily talk with it in.

Best wishes to you both with everything!

Thx Christine. I'll ask about that.

I think you need some clarity and a second opinion may help with that. Making decisions for another human being - particularly one you love - is very very hard. My heart goes out to you. You know your wife, and what she is made of. Do you think she is strong enough for whatever you think needs to be done to cure her? Then ask yourself if would she want this, talk to her see what she feels about the situation. Then make your decision. When I was diagnosed I determined I would do what I had to - no regrets - to try and fight this disease. You and she need to talk. If you can't then ask yourself, what would she want, and voice it to her, see if she concurs. Its only a nod or a head shake away. Hugs to you.

Linda is doing better every day. She's been breathing on her own the past 2 days and the P.T. got her out of bed and into the recliner. I do believe she will gain the strength to battle the cancer. But, with the agreement of her docs, she has not yet been told of the cancer. She sti9ll has to battle back to health and we're afraid to hit her with everything at once. I really do not look forward to that conversation. I know she has told me in the past that she wants a dnr order, but nothing in writing and she was resucitated (sp?) the 1st day in the hospital when I wasn't there. I think she knows that and is ok with it. It's terribly hard to know how to handle this. Her son, Michael, is on board about not telling her too much to soon but he is very much against the dnr. I'm afraid that this is only going to get harder.

David: I'm dumb - what is a dnr? My prayers are that Linda can get over the immediate problems and then continue into curing the cancer. Sounds like a lot, but it's been done by others, and with your help (and Michaels), I pray it can be done by Linda. Julieann

Do not resuscitate.

Thanks, Paul. I assumed it was something along those lines - hate to even talk about such, and I know David and Michael hate it. I pray that Linda can get well, then accept and be able to endure her upcoming battle. Such sad news, but others have succeeded, and I pray she will also.

Julieann

Yeah... DNRs are funky. I am not necessarily pro DNR. The treatment my dad received with out a DNR was by far, not the same treatment he received with one. I think it's almost better to have someone you trust making this kind of decision for you. As long as you talk to them and they know your wishes, it's the way to go.

Someone who loves you will abide by your wishes and not let you suffer. My step dad had me as his POA. When he was sick and unconscious - and dying - they kept approaching me about turning off his ventilator - to me - him suffocating to death was NOT okay. I knew he was a strong man and if anyone would get better it would be him. SO I told them as long as he was in no pain (he wasn't) I would rather allow his body to decide. In the end it did. But they hounded me for three weeks.

hugs. I hope you don't have to go this route.

I put myself on DNR in 2010. Actually, I did not want to live like I was on my death bed for several months, which was pretty bad. A doctor didn't call me train wreck for nothing, I looked like Hell Raiser and Freddy Kruger. Anyway, several doctors, staff, had to speak with me, sign papers, and put a yellow band on my wrist. So be careful with those yellow support ribbons, which stands for DNR also Low and behold, I'm still here.