Denise,

I know this is so hard - I was on the verge of giving up in hospital when everything was going horribly wrong, then I remembered how many people were rooting for me, and worrying about me. It was enough to push me through the worst of it and keep going.

You can do it, and we're all behind you!

What comes after stopping Tx is a very painful and cruel death so just remember it's a very small time to have to put up with this Tx and we have all done it and we are all here to help you get through it so take a deep breath and let's get to work killing that cancer and before long you will be posting helping others get thru their Tx.

Denise

After 3 weeks of TX, even if you were suicidal enough to stop TX, you would not feel one bit better, only worse. You have absolutely nothing to gain from quitting and everything to win from finishing. That said, I certainly have had those very same thoughts many times during TX, it's natural.
No sugar coating it, it is going to get even worse for a while.
It is indeed hard , and nobody who has not gone through it has any real idea of how hard it is. I used to think that I was so tough that I would breeze through this, but I never truly knew what pain, frustration, anger, and despair were until I did tough out the TX. You can do this, just like the other OCF members have done it.
As long time readers know, I take a contrarian view to most conventional wisdom so my advice is to start putting a little wine down your feeding tube once you get it. Of course ask your doctors, but all of mine were fine with it (and of course I'd have done it even if they weren't). It perks up the pain pills, dulls the depression, and adds a certain tumor humor to be able to say "cheers" to your family as you syringe a little wine down the tube (don't do beer, it will cause swelling and gas and is messy)
Keep the Faith
Charm

Thank you Charmed for the words of wisdom. There is of course no way I would stop treatment. I'm from Texas and we NEVER quit! I was just having a bad few days. Love the idea about the wine. We'll try that today! Always keeping the faith and so very thankful for the kindness of strangers on this site.

Bad days are the norm it's a one foot in front of the other prospect. Keep plugging away and soon you'll say oh my God one day left. I tell people to try this it may help - get a waterpik - add lukewarm water, a tiny bit of mouthwash - and use the tongue cleaner on the lowest setting - it will freshen and clean all those hard to reach spots and maybe reduce the sweet taste. And help with the thrush. You can also try flattened club soda as it heals like the baking soda mixture but you can swallow it so it helps the throat. Hugs! Keep going.

Whew this is bringing tears to my eyes. I start treatment on Monday
Nov 5. This is all good info to have soi can be prepared but, wow is it scary! I will be doing radiation for 6 wks and Cisplatin 3x. Does that mean I will have the "3 big bags" like everyone is talking about?

Denise L
Yes.
It will be tough, but you can do it! I hope you have been eating and eating. Enjoy your favorites this weekend. Not to be pessimistic, but they may not be your fav's when you're done.
Keep in touch as you begin the journey. We are here. Don't be afraid to yell, curse, cry....whatever, we are here and we know.
Will be watching for updates!
Blessings,
Kathy

Hi Denise for what it's worth chemo nothing compared to rads... I had the big back method. And was okay with it. Not everyone has it so easy unfortunately - hope you do.

Denise-Thank you so much for sharing your experience. Many hugs to you as you go through this! My husband will be starting his radiation in December, after his 4th chemo treatment. Being able to read about other people's experiences, I'll be better able to help him through his treatment. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.