It has been over 1 and half after the neck dissection. My husband had a hard time eating, it actually become worse. After radiation and chemo he had picked up eating slowly then went back to ensure again.
My question
1. Can vomitting rip off the thin layer of mouth ? He vomitted twice in the last month and he suffered an increased pain and some blood came out. This was due to hydromorphone and coffee that prompted the vomit. Now he is eating very little but drinking ensure.
2.How long does it take for a person to start feeling normal again . We are now sitting at over 6 months now.
3. Why does he feel so nervous and scared all the time. I keep motivating him all the time. Talk positive but he seems very scared. Please help. Has any one experienced this before.

Hi Roma! Sorry to hear your husband is still struggling. Everyone recovers at their own pace as well as handles things in their own way. Many cancer patients see a therapist to help them to deal with their emotions. Some caregivers get help for themselves as well.

Im sorry, I do not know the answer to your vomiting question. Recovery can vary greatly from patient to patient. I hope you are able to see an improvement in your husband if you compare his current state to how he was immediately following finishing his treatments. Surgeries can take a while to get over. If his surgery was 6 weeks ago he should be feeling better, maybe not 100% but some better. Check with the doc.

Best wishes with continued improvements!

Thanks Christine . I will talk to the doctor.

Hi - well I understand the nervous and scared part - this disease is terrifying - your husband has been through alot too - I just finished radiation and chemo 2 weeks ago and am still a mess - somewhat - he probably does need counselling to deal with everything he has gone through - and likely the fear of recurrence - he may also have fears about work, family etc.... it helps to have someone to talk to. Plus his cancer was very involved by the sounds of it. Not sure if he had surgery prior to rads and chemo but if he did that's even harder in some ways. It's a harder physical recovery - for sure.

Normal is another thing - I think - mind and body go hand and hand - since you say he's scared and feeling down - etc... That can very much have an impact on his physical state - and let me tell you some of the side effects of the chemo and rads and surgery - can be very frustrating - this can also get you down. They say it's one month recovery for every week of radiation. But that's physical recovery and can be hampered by a persons mental state - plus what christine says is true - everyone heals at their own rate. He will eventually find his normal but I do suggest maybe you both join a wellness group, or get counseling.

Vomiting - did actual skin come out? Your mouth naturally sloughs off dead skin to begin with - But the blood would be unusual - if you vomit hard enough it's possible to irritate your throat etc and possibly vomit blood it's the amount that's important if there's a lot I would have him talk to his dr.... Looking at your signature - I can't tell if he had his lymph nodes removed - in march - or an MRI in March - if he had surgery in march then that would make sense since he has stitches still inside his throat - they could bleed - if pulled. I do say if it happens again you should check with your dr.

Also certain pain drugs effect people differently - hydromorphone - or any other pain med - may be what is making him feel down. They do have side effects - is he still in a lot of pain? A friends husband gets totally boggled mentally when given any pain med, and my mom was super sensitive to them to - she went from being chatty and bright - to almost comatose in less than 24 hours when they changed her pain meds while she was in the hospital - It really depends on the person.

I wish I could help you more - best of luck. - hopefully your hubby will turn a corner soon. Take care!

Dear Roma: I am so very sorry to hear about you and your husband's struggles. I am seven weeks into recovery. My treatment ended on 3/31. I can relate to your husband very much. I had a dear old friend visiting this week, whom I have not seen since I was diagnosed in December. She used the word depression and at first I cringed, but I have started reading about post-cancer depression it is real and scary. I saw myself in these articles, especially those by a New York Times writer and cancer survivor, Dana Jennings. You can Google Dana Jennings "After Cancer, Ambushed by Depression." I found it validating to read. I have lost my zest for food (and I have had a huge appetite and have been a HUGE food lover) but my mouth is in such pain, I rely on my feeding tube. This does not help the depression. I feel isolated and lonely a lot, in spite of a loving partner and fun kids to cheer me up. I feel like I am not my old self, but I have not found my new self. I hope you find this article helpful. For me, to know that I am not that different from other survivors is a great relief. Let me know how things progress. I will keep you in my prayers. -Michelle

Thanks Cheryl and Michelle.

He has lowered his dose of hydromorphone. vomitting occured as coffee reacted with hydromorphone.
He been adviced to see the physio therapist as he feels constant choking feeling. THis is due to the neck dissection.

Cheryl he finished radiation and chemo 2010. Had neck dissection in mid of april where lymph nodes were taken out and only 1 had cancer in it.

He is not that scared any more but i can still feel it. Thanks for your suggestion . I will look into getting us in a wellness program.

Thanks Michelle for sharing your thoughts. Best of luck to you as well. I hope you do have a fast recovery. I will keep you updated.

Roma

Glad he appears to.be doing better - the tightness in my throat is still there but I am only 5 weeks post radiation however I am eating and swallowing ok. I do yawn it helps with the muscles - neck exercises.

1, sitting upright in a chair and staring straight ahead tilt your head forward (towards your chest) as far as it can go. Do this 10 times twice daily.
Then in the same starting position tilt you hear back as far as it can go. 10 times twice daily.

2. Same starting position - turn yor head to the left as far as it can go - do this 10 tomes twice daily. Then do the same on the opposite side.

3. Same starting position. Reach hand up rest it on the top of your head then gentlly lower your ear towards your shoulder (the weight of the hand helps the stretch) then hold for 15 second. Do this 3 times. Then change sides.

This should also be done twice a day.

Finally to help with swallowing take your tongue press the tip up int the roof of your mouth then swallow - 5 times - do this often throughout the day.

This is all they gave me for the neck for now. I do have some arm and shoulder exercises - ive been given if you need them.

Good luck!!

Thanks Cheryl God Bless You.