My crazy/distressing experience in ICU:
While still "under the influence" as I began to come to I kept pressing the red light on the device on my finger which I was too doped up to realize was the oxygen monitor. My feet were restrained and in pressure cuffs because I had had the fibula replacement of my jaw. I wanted to turn my other foot out at the ankle so that my hip could be rotated slightly and have some kind of support placed under the small of my back, both to ease severe pain from being flat on my back which has some slight deformities. I will never know if I had been told where the call button and morpine pump button were and was too medicated to remember or was not told but it was 2 days before I could communicate that need through coherent writing. Adding to my confusion was that the clock was broken so there was no way to judge how long this was going on. When I was more alert I kept trying to get the attention of the nurse at the desk sitting at th window to my room who was supposed to be monotoring me but she was busy on the computer. Finlly I was able to get help from a nurse on a susequent shift.
I had to ask to be bathed several days post surgical - neither a hygenic nor comfortable situation. It seem that this is far from a priority in ICU.

Wow - you've been through a lot Malka... kudos to you on your cancer free status. It's sad that you have to ask to be bathed. When I was nursing even in intensive care we would give a regular bed bath. Or have a student do it, with supervision. I know nurses are overstressed - and overworked, but frankly there should be a level of care that is maintained. Basic cleanliness is good for the patient and their wounds as well as the fact that it promotes normalcy.

I have told my husband that post op... I want only him and my kids to see me for the first 3-5 days... I will not be able to talk, I will likely be a mess and on pain meds - There is no point for a friend to come visit... even distant family. If my dad were here I would likely tell him to come on day 5 too. My inlaws as well. What is the point of seeing them if I am non responsive? Plus a room full of people who may or may not have colds etc... is a bad idea anyway. When I was nursing we were taught to be the patient's advocate - how can you do that when you can't even administer proper care...

While in the coma, I must have been a wild man there, I awoke a few days later than I should have. I was bound from my hands down to my ankles. The 1st thing my Oncologist noticed was that I had a nice open wound about 4 to 5 inches long. He wanted to fire the whole crew that took care of me, but that was only a handful as I was Quaranteed in a lead shield. I talked my butt off so noone would be fired. I told him maybe I wasn't my self but was acting strange. His arguement was that I was a patient and should have been treated much gentler as I was a patient and should be treated as such. We did come to an understanding, and no one was fired but sure did get lectured. I still have a 4 inch scar and much pain in my feet even tho the right ankle was by far the worst. Yep, I still hurt but fell good about them not losing a livelyhood. I have some damn funny looking marks on my ankles too. LOL But hell, my whole body is one large scar from being laid open so many times over the years. One of my nurses was my Gal friends step mom and for a long while she hated me not knowing I protected them. Life goes on and on.

The reality of the situation is - every patient is an individual and should be treated as such. Here are always difficult situations - but taking the easy way out and tying someone up is not the way to go unless absolutely necessary and then precautions have to be taken to prevent injury to the limbs that are restrained... Your dr. Is right -!they deserved some of the trouble they got. And your friend's should have treated her experience as the learning experience it was. If she got in trouble from the dr. It was because something had been done incorrectly - its not your fault!

Medical errors are a serious problems and can be potentially life threatening. You can read about the errors in my care in:

http://www.disabled-world.com/disability/publications/neck-cancer-patient.php

The best way of preventing such errors is to have family and friends be with patient and not hesitate to challenge their care givers.

Itzhak Brook MD