My name is Tammy and I am the wife of a newly diagnosed head and neck cancer patient. He has had a biopsy that did not actually reveal the origin of his cancer, but is being treated for at least four tumors in the right side of his head near the tonsil. He is currently undergoing Radiation and Chemotherapy at the same time. He is having a peg put in today as his mouth in week 3 is too sore to swallow or eat. Hubert is 63 and has been a heavy smoker for his entire life. His tumors were too advanced for any surgery. The hard part is that we live in a tiny town in southeast Arkansas where treatment is not a possibility at all. He is having to live in Hot Springs with my parents so that he can get to Little Rock every day for his treatments. He is severely depressed at this time and feels that he is wasting his energy and time even treating this disease. He believes he is going to die from this cancer anyway. Is there any way that I can get him some stories of people who survived this??
Thanks..

Tammy, I am new here too and I don't have any answers for you, but I will keep you and your husband in my thoughts and prayers.

Tammy it is way to soon to give up.
One thing is for sure, giving up the treatment will totally reduce his chances. There are many here who were successfully treated and are enjoying life. To be sure the treatment is not fun (!). You might see if there is anything his team(?) can do re depression.

you might show him this site?

M

Tammy,

There are many survivors here that were Stage IV and thought that they would never make it. Some had to be prodded by our family here to go through with treatment. We can do a good job at that if your husband gives us a chance.

For sure, if he stops treatment, he will die from this disease.

Jerry

Jerry:
I know this and an encouraging him daily that he can get through this with help from his friends and family. Thanks for the kind words. If I can get him to log on, I will..
Tammy

Susan:
Thanks for the prayers. Every little bit of support I can muster I am appreciative of. My parents, God bless them, are the ones doing most of the caregiving, because I have to work, and we live three hours away from the treatment center and his excellent doctors. We are all trying to deal with his negative attitude as best we can, and the doctors are trying to get him to take some anti-depressants, but it is hit and miss.
Tammy

Tammy -- If you can get him on this site, there are tons of stories of Stage IV long-term survivors. Fear and depression are normal, but the more active he can be, both mentally and physically, the easier it will be for him to get through treatment.

Been there, done that, got the T-Shirt!! We are all here to help!

Tammy,

If he would like to talk to someone, have him call me @ 727-322-5669 during the day, EST. As everyone has said it won't matter what Stage he is if he stops Tx as he will die, no if's ands or buts. Remind him that his Tx will is only for 6 to 7 weeks and that is nothing in comparison to the rest of his potential life. I won't lie to you and say he is guaranteed to
be cured by this Tx but I would rather go out fighting than just give up without a battle.

We are all here to help the both of you and your parents.

Tammy, He can beat this like a lot of us did. Just boot his butt and show him this site. Once he starts to read it he just gethooked like a lot of us did. He is just a young guy yet too and that is in his favor, Don't tell anyone, but I am 73 1/2. LOL Good luck and you are both in my prayers and thoughts.

Hi Tammy and welcome to OCF.

The beginning of this disease can be so hard. You hear the news, go to specialists and learn words you never wanted to learn. You are thrusted into this new life head first (seriously) then the emotional part comes. He must continue his treatment and with the support of you and other family he can do it. I would highly suggest getting him to this site. When I found this site I realized I was not alone and that changed everything for me.