Hi Christine,


I wish I had some words of wisdome for you but I know I don't. I just wish you didn't have to go through this and I'm scared for you. Did I read that correctly, that your surgery will be about 16 hours?!? I'm pretty sure that anyone here would feel the way you do and just wish they could sleep their way thourgh this and get to the recovery side of the journey. Sometimes life just isn't fair and I feel like now is one of those times.

I guess all I can do is be there for you and I fully intend to be. You will be in my prayers everyday. I know I have told you this before but I will tell you again in case you are the type that doesn't ask for help:) If I can do anything for you please let me know. Maybe, you can send me your address in a PM and I can get some things together for you and mail them.

You say you are not strong, but you are. It's ok and good to be scared...that means you are feeling the feelings that are normal. You will get through this and we will be here for you every step of the way.

xoxo

We are all praying for you and if there's one person who can do this, it's you.

I have met many people who have had the flap rom the inner forearm and most of them went very well, so we'll pray that you are on that side of the ledger - you deserve some good luck at some point!

My first surgery was 15 hours. I remember the groups of doctors talking about taking a "lunch break" - which immediately gave me visions of lying there alone in the operating room while they leave to eat their tuna sandwiches! Of course they take breaks - but they overlap between teams. I still get a chuckle out of the first visual tho!

Whether the surgery is 5 hours or 15 - you won't know the difference, and if you are like me you will be very happy when they finally start that anesthesia countdown. I think you are at the place where you are ready to say "Let's git 'er dun".

You aren't walking this path alone Christine. Your Angels walk every step with you.

Donna

christine

good luck. The flap from my forearm took perfectly, and they also had to use microscopes and "tag team" me. So I hope you flap takes also. The aftermath of surgery is such a shocker and I feel lucky to have survived the hospital. If you can bring a wireless laptop with you or have someone drop one off, it is a godsend during those long long days and nights. Almost all hospitals have wireless connections for their patients now and you can pick up one suitable for your purposes for under $300
Or consider one of the new "net books" which are very compact and can be gotten for about $200. Just bring your AC adaptor and you won't have to worry about battery life which is what drives the cost up on any laptop. Mine only has about an hour and half but came with everything including a web cam. I had fun taking pictures of the "good nurses" plus the picture you referenced of my flap was taken with this laptop webcam. That way you can keep in touch with OCF.
Drink a chocolate milkshake for me too today.
Finally, I hear you so clearly about the PEG. It is so tiresome and time intensive. Still as you know better than anyone, we do what we got to do,
Best wishes
Charm

I had a forearm free flap too, and it took well. It was an 11-hr surgery altogether between the ENT and the plastic surgeon. One of the blood vessels was too tight, and the plastic surgeon had to take me back in the following day to loosen up the vessel and put a few new ones in, just in case, but the rest was fine. I was reading surgical notes, and was blown away by what the doctors can do.

The aftermath of the surgery is physically draining. The flap is usually several times the size it needs to be, and eventually it will shrink down to the normal size, but in the meantime, you will be unable to speak and probably even close your mouth. So be ready with notepads and pencils or some sort of a PDA or laptop where you can type up whatever you need to say. The good news that it heals well and you'll be amazed at how much progress you'll make in just a few weeks.

It's hard. But we've all been through so much, it feels like there's very little we cannot handle. I just wish that you didn't have to go through it.

We're all pulling for you.

Christine,

I also had the forearm free flap, microscope, tag team stuff in a 12 hour surgery and the free flap has done great. They have a little device with a pencil type attachment that they use to frequently check the pulse/bloodflow in the transplanted vein that's part of the free flap to insure it's working and healing as expected. The free flap felt huge to me for a while, like marshmallows stuffing my mouth full, but it did shrink down in time.

Sending you prayers and good wishes,
Kim

Christine,
I too wished that I could say something.. anything that could help.
Thinking of you and wishing you well!

Markus

This is the big one girl......its a toughie but so are you.Scared witless is ok Christine its normal and human and i wish my arms were big enough to reach across the miles and hold you close,but my heart is big enough and you are held in it.

love liz

Christine,
I wish I could take some of this ordeal away for you. May you haave speedy and complete recovery with a maximum of dignity and a minimum of pain and be forever well after this.
Malka

Christine

The device that Kim mentioned is called a Doppler <sp?> they regularly use to check the blood flow.

Unfortunately, you will be requiring assistance from the nursing staff for washing/bathroom for a short time, BUT it is only temporary. With drains, drips, trache suctioning and PEG - it can be really full on.

I had a sheet of paper that read "PAN PLEASE" next to my bed so I could just hold that up when I needed it. I know how much it SUCKS- words do not describe.

Once you are able to get up to the shower you will probably be given a plastic neck collar - it is intended to cover the trache so as no water, soap, shampoo etc gets in. It justs sits around your neck over the trache and is held together by velcro.

Like so many others, I am thinking of you and will be wishing you a super speedy recovery.

Karen xx