Hi Pat,

You sound alot like me. While Tom was going thru Tx, I would leave the house two times's a day just to sit somewhere and cry, think, call someone...almost Never cried in front of him...I couldn't bear seeing him see me that way. It made him angry because, I think, he wanted me to be strong. You were working while this was going on, which was fortunate for you. I was constantly running around trying to find things to feed him...to comfort him. But he remained strong and dedicated to showing me how strong he was and still is.
Now, we get the results of his first post-Tx PET today. I know that I do not have to tell you that I am a secret mess inside. I am picking him up at work this morning...he went back to work a week ago...this is the day that I have been dreading as he is so positive that all will be clear!!!
If your hubby is communicating his emotions with you, you are lucky. If not, just try and show him the positive side you have tucked inside of you at all times--later, go somewhere and scream, pray, and then, relax. The best thing that you can do to help him and yourself is to go with the flow...smile, it could be alot worse! And it can get alot better...look at those 20+ year survivors!!!
So, what is this 12 step program meetings you are talking about? AA or another support group?

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Donna