Sammie, I feel so sorry for you. It is hard to prepare and even if you do, it's still a sock and hurts. THe day before my Dad died, we were talking and he said, Jim, I want you to promise me one thing. I asked what it was. I was aksed to promise and take care of my mother and brother if something happened to him.. Of course I promised him that and the next morning he died of an anneuyrsm. The day my mom died from cancer, she told me to take my wife and kids and go shopping or something and to quit woorying about her constantly. We went shopping thet evening and when we came back home. she was dying. I guess we will never be prepared or have certain signs to guide us to the when it will happen. It was a ssock when they died and we thought we were prepared. The grief is there no matter how you prepare.. You are in my prayers.