I'm with your mom on that one Suzi!
When it was thought my jaw was the only tumour, the extensive surgery they suggested, plus rad and chemo, had me horrified, although I'm only 58!
If it had meant survival I THINK I would have gone for it, but am not absolutely certain.
For me the 'Quality of Life' issue was a big one and I've had a brilliant time, including a trip to California, these last few months --- in-between blood transfusions and pain and fatigue of course.
I think if I'd had the surgery in June, I would still be in a much darker place right now, with still no guarantees.
And my kids and partner understand and stand by my decisions.

Brenda

Brenda in UK--Diagnosis 30/5/07--undifferentiated carcinoma in right jawbone and muscles. Stage 4
6/7/07--new diagnosis primary is in lung. Finished 4cycles of palliative carboplatin/gemcitabine
therapy September 07
Now dying to live!