I am saddened to hear of your self-professed addiction. You are on the right path in making the decision to rid yourselves of this ugly habit. However, it is not likely you will be able to without the help of your doctor or professionals trained to assist. As Barb explains, you could very easily do this by cutting your dosages back every few days. However, from the tone of your post it does not appear to me that the physical addiction is your worst enemy. I see the signs you are communicating in justifying your addiction even though you characterize it as "HIGHLY" addicted. This is a pretty obvious indication that you need to find a more structured process to tame your addiction for the rest of your life.

If you are taking 6 tylenols every 2 hours, it is a miracle you have not totally trashed your liver. This is way too much acetomenophen for anyone to take and your doctor(s) should have seen the signs long before now unless you are churning through a plethora of doctors to feed your habit.

I am truly sorry to hear of your lifelong struggles and I can't imagine how tough it would be to lose a leg at such a young age. If you value your life, do whatever it takes to get this monkey off of your back. You are caught in a viscous cycle now between addiction and depression and you will never be able to determine which one is causing the other.

As far as physical addiction, I have seen people die in 2 days from heroin withdrawal and less from methadone withdrawal. They, too, felt they would avoid the shame and do it on their own. I also saw someone who made his friends tie him to the bed for 4 days while he kicked his habit and he was one of the lucky ones that lived through it only to overdose years later.

You have tried 8 times and found that it is not as easy as you thought. How many more times will it take to convince you. You were given a gift of life many years ago with your battle with osteo sarcoma. Use this to make something of your life. You have made it this far.

Feel free to email me if you want to talk about this more. I hope I didn't sugar coat my message to you.

Ed

SCC Stage IV, BOT, T2N2bM0
Cisplatin/5FU x 3, 40 days radiation
Diagnosis 07/21/03 tx completed 10/08/03
Post Radiation Lower Motor Neuron Syndrome 3/08.
Cervical Spinal Stenosis 01/11
Cervical Myelitis 09/12
Thoracic Paraplegia 10/12
Dysautonomia 11/12
Hospice care 09/12-01/13.
COPD 01/14
Intermittent CHF 6/15
Feeding tube NPO 03/16
VFI 12/2016
ORN 12/2017
Cardiac Event 06/2018
Bilateral VFI 01/2021
Thoracotomy Bilobectomy 01/2022
Bilateral VFI 05/2022
Total Laryngectomy 01/2023