Well things have gotten worse... Instead of addressing the "morphine" problem, which led Dad into the hopsital in the first place... NOW he has developed severe pneumonia, is on a respirator, and has a staph(?) infection in his blood, oh and I forgot the low hemoglobin level, which led to another blood transfusion.

It is absolutely amazing how quickly all of this developed. Sat. night I went to bed with my mind at ease, only to be woken up early Sunday morning by my mother crying and telling us all to hurry there and rush his living will there. The hosp. staff scared the hell out of my mom and made it seem as if he was dying right then and there. We were all rushing there, in the snow, thinking the worst already happened. It was the WORST experience of my life.

Thankfully, things are starting to improve slightly... his blood pressure and heart rate are normal now, 104 fever has broke, lung capacity was better today, EKG shows "very" strong heart, and his delirium has seemed to go away (hard to tell completely since he can not talk with the tube down his throat).

We are still waiting for his follow-up scans (PET scan, CT), which is frustrating. One good thing is that his mouth seemed to heal in the past couple days. It was an absolute mess for the past 2 months!

I feel like if it not one thing, it is another with him. I feel so bad for him, as soon as one problem goes away, three more occur. I'm sorry if I am complaining, but even the other cancer patients stare at him because he is such a mess. I can't understand why he is having trouble with EVERYTHING and no one can understand why??? Once again, I'm sorry for venting, it is just so frustrating (which I'm sure all of you know).

Thanks for listening!