Kimberly,

It sounds like your friend is so overwhelmed that she in not processing the information that the dr is telling her. My parents experience this with my sister. I always go along to add an extra pair of ears. I will take notes while my parents respond to the info that the dr gives. Sometimes they are so emotional that they cannot remember important info. Maybe you could offer to go along to take notes or make suggest that they invite another family member along to take notes.

This was so helpful in my sister's situation. At one point a Petscan was supposed to be scheduled for the next day. They never took her to get the scans though. My mom and dad were dealing with heavy emotional issues and didn't remember that my sister was supposed to get a petscan. If I hadn't looked over the notes and asked about it, there is a chance that she may not have been able to get a scan (b/c of insurance of outpatient care).

My sister also had her nodes removed in her neck and they did make an incision from behind one ear to the other. She did have a trach for about 23 days.