Hi Everyone,

I'm back to update you on the struggle my 81 year old mom has been through during the last few months. The flap did take and she came home with a trache and the feeding tube. It has been 4 months of 24 hour nursing care. The trache was removed once but had to be reinserted because she choked on her mucous. It was finally removed, hopefully for good, 3 weeks ago. She has been trying to eat but with no teeth most of the food ends up on her chin.

Anyway, to make a long story short, it appears that the cancer has recurred only 4 months after such a major surgery. Two hard lumps have shown up on either side of the graft and one has puss and blood oozing out of it. The doc has ordered a CT scan, but we have seen this very thing happen twice before and I'm very scared for her.

At 81 years old, when do you say enough? She barely survived the last surgery. What will happen if she chooses not to do any more treatment?