Thank you all. She had a little birthday party with her classmates after school and she had a good time. I think I managed to keep my tears from her although I bawled all day at school. (I'm a teacher and I'm sure my kids thought I had gone off the deep end, as usually happens to teachers in the spring.) My sister, too, assured me we will see David again, he just got to heaven before us. I just miss him so. My son just bought his first vehicle - a 1967 Chevy pickup and I know my brother would love it. I'm sad he can't be here to help Brandon, as restoring old vehicles and tinkering with them was one of his joys in life, but I know he's giving us a "two thumbs up" from heaven for picking a classic. After his surgery, when he could no longer speak, he would always give us the two thumbs up when we asked how he was. This will be a long life without him and yes, I am a Christian, but when I die if I find out this Heaven thing is a crock, I'm going to be kicking someone's (#$$!!!!!!!
I know, that was probably sacreligious, but I can't help but think that sometimes. It's like all hopes are pinned on it and at time like these it's so hard to put all your trust into something you can't confirm. I guess I'm still down from putting all my hope and faith in a miracle and cure and getting the rug jerked out from under us. Sorry if I sound angry - I still am sometimes, but I know it's not what you need to hear. The important think is that his little girl did well today and I will just have to grow up and deal with this better. My sister is a "cup half-full" person and is so grateful for the 5 years David had with her. Being the "cup half empty" sister, I just see all the time ahead without him and all the memories that will never be made. Maybe I should take a drink from her cup sometime.
Bless you all,
Tonya


Sister of 32 year-old oral cancer victim. Our battle is over but the war rages on. My brother passed July 26, 2005. He was a smokeless tobacco user.