I went to my ENT appt with a doctor at Barnes hospital in St louis today,and after viewing my throat with a lit magnifying glass, he told me that all he can see is a broken blood vessel in my throat (I'm wondering if this isn't what caused me to vomit blood this past december?), and cysts on my tonsils. He said that he didn't even feel the need to do a biopsy, that he looks into a lot of throats each day and that the white spots I'm seeing are NOT what cancer looks like. He did tell me that if they get larger that I could one day have my tonsils removed. I felt like kissing this man and then dancing my way out of his office! Over the past 7 months I have seen about 6 different general practioners (comes with having insurance thru (retired) military, my dentist, two oral surgeons and the ENT surgeon I saw today, and although one of the g.p.'s and my dentist showed concern, I am finally accepting what all the others have said, that I am OKAY. I'm tired of looking into my throat a dozen times a day, losing sleep and imagining the worst. My sister told me that I'm wasting my time thinking I'm dying when I should be spending it "enjoying living". Which is what amazes me and puts me in awe of all of you on this site.....I only "thought" I had cancer, here all of you are who do have it (or people you love with it), and yet you continue to fight it and live and hope and enjoy your lives. In all honesty, and I'm not proud to say this, but I don't know that I could be as brave and upbeat as most of you seem to be. You blow me away and I admire each and every one of you. I'm also a strong believer in the power of prayer and I'm keeping you all in my prayers. Thanks for being here for me when I needed advice and a good ear to hear me out. Shelley