Dear Sharlee, PLEASE take some deep breaths and try to slow your brain down. [Unless the Docs tell you that you have 2 weeks to live and you need to get your affairs in order], you DO have the time to fight this -one day at a time- it is a much easier journey with that attitude. Start thinking "I will be done with this in a few months and back to my real life". We are sending hugs to you. Amy