At the end of the day, when new visitors come in they are mainly looking for 2 things in my opinion. First, they come looking for information. This site has probalby the best information regarding oral cancer that I've seen, hat's off to Brian. That doesn't even take in to account the wealth of experience people are privvy to when they check the boards.

Second, I think when they start checking the boards and participating, they are also looking for hope. Hope that maybe they can get through this ok, that they will survive the ordeal. They want to know they are not alone, others are going through this and are surviving just fine. Unfortunately, life being what it is, some participants don't fare so well in their battle. I once participated in a support group for caregivers who's partners had cancer, and the mortality rate for the caregivers in our group was higher than the corresponding group of cancer patients.

Of course, during the natureal progression of discussions, if we see that someone is getting pretty substandard care, then it probably is our "duty" as freinds if nothing else to pipe up and say something.

Anyway, that's my 2 cents worth.
Bob

SCC Tongue, stage IV diagnosed Sept, 2002, 1st radical neck dissection left side in Sept, followed by RAD/Chemo. Discovered spread to right side nodes March 2003, second radical neck dissection April, followed by more RAD/Chemo.