Hi Rosie,
Like you, I was diagnosed with left tonsil cancer and it was 5 years ago; so I am your 'elder sister'. If you read the brief description under my name, you can tell how advanced my stage of cancer was at that time. Unlike you, I didn't have surgery or feeding tube. I did undergo similar emotional downturn, feeling very depressed despite the support given by my husband and family. Most patients experience the anxiety and fear of the disease returning one day. This is something beyond our control and over worrying will just do more harm than good to our health. If you have regular check ups and are closely monitored by responsible doctors, you need not worry. You are lucky because you have people on this forum give you support and share with you their experience. I felt so lonely at my time because no one around me had gone through such sufferings and they really didn't know how to help me.
Just stay positive and enjoy every moment you have with your family and friends. You are welcome to email me if you want to hear more about my story.

Karen