Hello again everyone

Many thanks for your replies. I told my story in a very factual way, but underneath the facts there was all the emotion to deal with as well. There were days immediately after the intial surgery when I felt I was at the end of my endurance, that awful tracheotomy! feeling like I had someone elses tongue in my mouth (and not in a good way!), not being able to sleep, just feeling so helpless! and I hated to NG tube, I was so desparate to be able to eat again, but when the time came I found I didn't know how to swallow! it took about 2 weeks to be able to manage anything without choking.

My husband and family were a tremendous support, but I knew they were suffering as well - not knowing if I would come through it all.

I was in hospital for 5 weeks but once I came out I really started to feel so much better, but then I knew I had the dreaded radiotherapy to come - I was really hoping I wouldn't need it. I was so scared of what it my do to me, but as I said it wasn't so bad. Things never got so painful that I had to take morphine but the worst was the awful taste that developed in my mouth - it was like a living entity lurking there!!

The worst I felt was about 2 weeks after the end of RT, I developed a horrible cold and for the first time just took to my bed for 2 days!
My taste buds started to recover after about 4 weeks. I became very inventive at making soup concoctions and smoothies. Porridge became a large part of my diet and still is.

But when I look back all this seems so long ago, the worst thing now is knowing that this could come back at any tme and I might not even know - I had very few symptoms although I still have regular check ups - this type of cancer seems to be very stealthy.

Anyway I think I've rambled on enough, would love to hear from anyone who has experienced similar.

Best regards to all

Rosie