Hi BJT.
I would not want to comment on whether you could or should drink alcohol.
My Oncologists seemed to be unsure what to tell me when I asked them.
I have tried hard liquor, wine and beer.
The liquor and wine just left a bad aftertaste in my mouth all night. I found beer was better for me, and I felt that I was was getting some hydration and calories. For me, just a bit hard to go totally cold turkey.
But being that it's a social time with your wife and yourself, maybe try to have Non Alcohloic beer with her. If you miss the relaxing effects, maybe you can try some medical cannabis (if its legal in your state) a little before cocktail hour.
I use it at night only and it helps relax me for sleep.
I'm 10 months past chemo and rads, and I still have trouble eating, and only gained back 2 pounds after losing 55 pounds.
But, everything is improving slowly but surely.
Best wishes, enjoy the Spring.