This is my first post. I'm just going to be candid. I apologize in advance if this reads like a horror movie to some of you. I don't see how I can change this! I'm hoping for some answers or insight. This seems the group that can help me.

My 59 year old husband has dementia. Specifically, he has fronto-tempural dementia which affects his judgement, personality, logic, etc. He has / had an IQ of 155. But at this point, he can't convey information from a doctor. Needless to say, it's a horror.

He was dx with Lichen Planus in 2006. He had numerous lesions and he quit smoking at that time. FF to 2019, the lesions have been there all these years. November, 2018, his dentist saw a new (red) lesion. My husband hates doctors and again, often makes no sense. He told the doc he bit his cheek, which postponed a biopsy. I cannot interfere in this stuff (legally), plus my husband get (dangerously) angry if I pop up all over his medical care, which is something I have to do because of the dementia,

Dentist referred him to an oral surgeon who did a biopsy. Biopsy came back..

Impression: Erythroleukoplakia Left Cheek

Dx Lesion, left buccal mucosa: Moderate to focally severe epithelial dysplasia, hyperparakeratosis and chronic mucositis.

The doctor said (according to my impaired husband) that what he has was treatable but not curable. He said if it turned to cancer, it would be UNtreatable and incurable. The reason being, the lesions are all over his mouth. More than can be cut out.

He was treated with an oral steroid rinse. He went back to the oral surgeon to see if it did any good. ::no real answer:: And that was it.... that's all I know,

I do know two retired oncology nurses, 80 years experience, combined. They both told me, independently, that my husband has cancer... or will inevitably. I had searched around and pretty much figured this out.

Thing is, and I am sorry for anyone who reads this and is hurt by it; if there might be a chance to save him. he's not willing to make any lifestyle changes. He is going to continue to drink, chew nicotine gum, use nicotine lozenges and VAPE - this is all due his dementia.

It's been a couple weeks and my husband is convinced he has the same thing he has in 2006 and need only get it checked in another ten years. We have a hard copy of the pathology report but he just reads it and proclaims this to be the case.

As it is, he is happy so long as no one tells he has dementia or cancer. There is a huge blessing in this in that he is suffering no anxiety and feeling no pain at this time. For the record, he would never agree to have his head radiated or anything... plus it makes no sense to go through cancer treatment so you can die a horrible death from dementia.

So here is my question:

From what you read is there any real chance that my husband continue to live with these lesions for ten years? Or do you agree with the nurses, based on what you know about oral cancer?

Thanks. And again, I apologize for the tone of this. I've been dealing with the dementia for four years and I'm a bit strung out.