I wanted to say thank you all for responding to my post. Unfortunately, my mom's cancer returned with a vengeance in early December. Not only was it back on the right side of her neck but it was on the left side and throat as well. This was after a clear scan just five weeks prior. On December 19th, my mom went into the hospital because she felt like she was choking and they discovered a new tumor was obstructing her airway. If she hadn't had a trach, she would have suffocated. Mom stayed in the hospital and went through her first round of chemo in the days immediately after that and while that shrunk the tumors, her body just couldn't get back any strength. Her white blood cell count was terrifyingly low, she was developing pneumonia, she had constant diarrhea as her body wouldn't absorb food, she was nauseous and in immense pain as she always was. I went back down to FL and within 24 hours of getting there, the oncologist gave us the news that Mom needed to decide how she wanted to live out her last days or weeks. Mom opted to go to Hospice and so we arrived there on NYE day at 3:30 p.m. I was by her side each day and on January 2, 2018 my mom passed away. Things happened quickly (at least that's how it felt to me.)

I am thankful that I had those last 5 days with her. I was able to get my brother and dad to see her one last time so that they could have closure. I kept my aunt and uncle informed. I did all that I could to give her comfort and peace and everyone around her. I was able to hug and kiss her. I was able to tell her the things that I hoped she knew but needed to hear. She was tired and done with the disease and while I understood it, it was the most difficult thing I have ever witnessed.

I am so glad that I took the time and effort to be stressed out for her. I know that may sound weird, but it matters. The things that you all are doing for yourself or your loved one matters. It is worth something and while it can seem daunting and tiring, your loved one is appreciative. To have someone in the world helping you, it will always matter regardless of the outcome.

Thank you for responding to my post. It meant a lot to know someone understood what my day was like. I wish you all the best in your journeys.

Sincerely,
Lisha