How well I remember what you're dealing with since I was diagnosed only last August and had my surgery Sept 19th, 2016.
I was and still am alone with no family or close friends for support or help, but I'm okay and have come through this ordeal intact probably because I'm such a stubborn and tough person. Btw, I refused radiation and chemo and think that's why I'm as well as I am though I'm sure many people would disagree. Again, feel free to contact me for support.

Squamous cell carcinoma of tongue (never smoked and not HPV related) stage 4 diagnosed 8-2016; #6 trach, partial glossectomy, reconstruction. neck dissection 9-2016. 3 nodes out of 25 removed were positive for cancer--refused radiation & chemo; monitored via quarterly MRIs.