It is imperative that someone knows what is going on with your Dad's treatment, if he is avoiding doing so. As has been said already, ignorance is not bliss. There may be points at which decisions must be made, or a choice between two options, and someone needs to have the information to make the call. The OCF website is excellent, but you also have to ask ask ask the doctors -- What is being done, Who is doing it, Why is it being done and What will be the result?

We got very informed up-front and asked lots of questions (which the doctors did not mind) and it actually made a difference at several points in my husband's treatment (choice of chemo drug, dental options, etc.) For example, unless teeth are in really bad shape and cannot be salvaged, most of the top CCCs do not remove teeth before radiation -- or remove as few as possible -- because this can lead to post-treatment problems. Also, is your dad getting a feeding tube? If not, is there a nutritionist to help him as he will face a lot of problems eating during radiation, and maintaining weight. Many many issues which should be on the table before the "show" begins.

I agree you should go with your Dad and speak to the doctor, or at least call him/her for a phone consult.

There was a study published a few years ago (wish I could find the reference) which concluded that the patients who were the most involved in their cancer treatment did the best, in part because of the well-being which comes from feeling somewhat in control.

Good luck,
Gail


CG to husband Barry, dx. 7/21/05, age 66, SCC rgt. tonsil, BOT, 2 nodes (stg. IV), HPV+, tonsillectomy, 7x carboplatin, 35x tomoTherapy IMRT w/ Ethyol @ Johns Hopkins, thru treatment 9/28/05, HPV vaccine trial 12/06-present. Looking good!