Eric, you are free to vent anything you want (well... within reason and the forum rules that is ). We all understand what you are going thru and its no fun at all. We've been there and Im sure most of us remember exactly when we realized we could be in serious trouble with our cancer diagnosis. Facing your own mortality can be an eye opening and heart wrenching experience.

Im very glad your father is coming to help you. Call the American Cancer Society (anytime --- they're available 24/7 x365 days a year) right away. They have a volunteer driver program where its staffed with cancer patients/survivors and caregivers. Its a great program that helps many people all over the US. Ive been a volunteer driver for years.

Im sure you have people who are willing to help you. How about any organizations you belong to? A union, church or local fire company? How about neighbors or work friends or inquire about help with different local organizations from the phone book? People will surprise you in unexpected ways! Some you barely know can become your closest friend as they flock to your side to help in any way they can. Then there are those who may have been considered close friends or relatives and they run for the hills when they hear of your cancer diagnosis. Some people understand cancer as its touched their life in some way while others have an ingrained fear and cant be around anyone who is ill. You just never know but also if you dont ask, you wont get anyone's help.

We are here to help so please come back often and post often. Read and educate yourself about your illness. I have found it helps to have a general idea of what you are dealing with so you can attempt to prepare yourself.

Best wishes!!!