Louise because this is a reoccurrence I would ask the specialists directly about their recommendation/experienced perspective on neck dissection. Some people get a biopsy done of lymph nodes when some of them are slightly enlarged but in your husband's case a biopsy would be a hit and miss. ((And I think I have read on the forum that biopsies to lymph nodes might lead to undue spreading or disturbance of the cancer cell. Hopefully someone here can say yes or no to that last question.))

I am grateful you are seeking the best medical advice. In my husband's case the cancer was moderately aggressive & stage IV, therefore spread to two lymph nodes very rapidly. It had spread earlier on during the initial symptoms, there was tenderness in his neck.

Frozen sections are a must, this is the best way to know that you not only have all the cancer but also a wider than (1cm) clear margin. This used to be the accepted margin but recent studies have found that during the freezing process the tissue can vary/shrink by 5mm so results from frozen sections need to account for these possible variances.
http://oralcancernews.org/wp/wider-surgical-margins-better-for-early-tongue-cancer/


I am sure they will reassure you this will be done because in the case of soft tissue/tongue they get the (clear margin) results right there during the surgery, so they know exactly how much to take out. As for bone, in our case we had to wait over a month, so the surgeon was generous and took more jaw out for which we are very grateful but I had told him to air on the aggressive/precocious side.