What awful news you were given. It is completely normal to feel shocked and angry. If this cancer has not spread to any lymph nodes then it must still be a localised cancer. Can they not do further surgery with reconstruction?
What about localised Proton radiation.
If this was us, I would be chasing another opinion and that would be from a top Comprehensive Cancer Centre.
I will keep you and your Father in my thoughts and prayers.
Tammy

Caregiver/advocate to Husband Kris age 59@ diagnosis
DX Dec '10 SCC BOT T4aN2bM0 HPV+ve.Cisplatin x3 35 IMRT.
PET 6/11 clear.
R) level 2-4 neck dissection 8/1/11 to remove residual node - necrotic with NED
Feb '12 Ca back.. 3/8/12 total glossectomy/laryngectomy/bilat neck dissection/partial pharyngectomy etc. clear margins. All nodes negative for disease. PEG in.
March 2017 - 5 years disease free. Woohoo!