Hello K. I am so sorry you find yourself in this position.
I want to offer you some reassurance on the choking . In my 30 plus years of nursing I have never seen this . Should your tumour be in grave danger of blocking your airway the medical team will do a tracheostomy. We do not let anyone suffocate to death. Please discuss this fear with your oncologist when you next visit. You do not need this added fear and worry.
Of course a Hospice is perfectly placed to help but if there is not one in your area then the local hospital will assist. Maybe your cancer society can help with home nurses?
When the end is near you can be kept very comfortable and without anxiety with a continuous infusion via a pump, with a small needle inserted into the abdominal tissue. This is not to "knock" you out, but simply to take any pain away and relieve any anxiety. Many studies have shown that morphine does not hasten death. Most people are conscious until about the last 24 hours, then slowly have longer periods of "sleep" as the body shuts down. Death should and will be peaceful. Not a terrifying gasp for air.
This is generally a time for families to gather around you and together, to support both you and other family members..
Please, please discuss this with your team and your family. Put some plans in place.
Thinking of you all,
Tammy.

Caregiver/advocate to Husband Kris age 59@ diagnosis
DX Dec '10 SCC BOT T4aN2bM0 HPV+ve.Cisplatin x3 35 IMRT.
PET 6/11 clear.
R) level 2-4 neck dissection 8/1/11 to remove residual node - necrotic with NED
Feb '12 Ca back.. 3/8/12 total glossectomy/laryngectomy/bilat neck dissection/partial pharyngectomy etc. clear margins. All nodes negative for disease. PEG in.
March 2017 - 5 years disease free. Woohoo!