OK I am told I have used up my lifetime quota of Radiotherapy and Surgery and as I now have a (10 years on)recurrence of growths in my throat as well as Fistulas - we are trying a course of Carboplatin (arm drip) every 3 weeks (3x so far)- first we tried another with tablets via PEG but no result/changes. I have a PEG and now a Mi-key as I cannot swallow food or drink due to the tumor in my throat and of course I have a tracheotomy to breath. I am due for a scan latter this week to see if there is a visible change to the mass in my throat. I suspect there is not - although stopping any further growth would be success :-) Now my question is if the growths continue how do I die ? I have a good heart etc and breath through my neck and eat via PEG so I by pass the mass in my throat - so does it keep growing until it hemorrhages and I die in a sudden explosion of blood loss ? I have unlimited morphine etc available so pain is not an issue. I have already been coerced into signing a release absolving the medical team from failing to resuscitate me in the event of a hemorrhage and assumed that was because they cannot. Things came to a head this past June but here I am 5 months on slowly getting thinner day by day LOL