Deborah, I'm sorry you're dad is facing this but glad he's got you, your sister, his GF to get him through.

Could be that your dad and his GF worry that it's too much trouble/expense for you to come, or that visitors would mean more work cleaning up, entertaining, etc. And parents often do not want kids -- even adult kids -- to see us so weak and vulnerable.

Some ways to help: arrange housekeeping service, dogsitter, grocery/meal delivery, lawn care. If they are feeling reclusive they may appreciate you volunteering to be the liaison to friends and family posting/calling everyone with updates.

He is lucky to have you!

M


53
T3N2aM0 HPV+
5/26/13 discovered painless superball-sized lymph node in neck
6/26/13 DX SCC R palatine tonsil
7/16/13 TORS tonsillectomy & selective ND, mets to 2 nodes
9/3/13 Cisplatin and rads begin, tolerated 1.5 of 3 planned chemo doses
10/16/13 Treatment ends
Dec 13 Ulcer appears at surgery site
Jan 17 Biopsy -- no cancer!
Feb 17 CT/PET Scan lights up tonsil bed & nasal cavity, docs say probably inflammation, don't panic, rescan when ulcer subsides