Hi Nicki,

I'm so sorry for your loss. I know all too well how it feels to lose a parent to this dreadful disease. My mom just passed away 3 short months ago. There are some very similar parallels in our stories. My sister lives only a mile from my parents house and has 2 children as well, one is 10 and the other just over a year. My dad spends a lot of time there as well, but it is more my sister that has a hard time being at the house rather than my dad. It is extremely hard for me too, but she avoids it quite often, as well as avoids bringing the kids there. Lucas, her oldest, was VERY close to my mom, and I'm afraid that they are repressing their emotions rather than dealing with them right now. I know it is still very early on, and over the next few months you will experience a whole other spectrum of feelings, but in my experience it is better to deal with them as they come so it isn't so hard a few months down the road when the weight of them is that much heavier. I began seeing a grief therapist a few weeks after my mom passed and it really does help to have someone to talk to. I have also looked into grief groups for women who have lost a mother... maybe it would be good for your mom to find a support group for those who have lost a spouse.

It is good that your mom has you and your family to help her through, especially the kiddos, I know they are really the only ray of sunshine in our lives as we go through this right now as well. But your mom needs to make sure she doesn't use them as too much of a crutch either. I'm afraid the longer she stays away from home the harder it will be for her to return. I understand how overwhelming the feelings are, this must be so hard for all of you

I'm so sorry you have to go through this. I'm sorry that any of us have to. Sometimes I wonder if this all really happened because it just feels so unbelievable. Reality can be pretty harsh when it hits. Please let us know how you and your family get on and keep coming back for support.