I really like the phrase "new normal".

With cancer I have been surprised at what I have been able to adjust to. No, things aren't the same as before, but I find I can adjust to the "new normal"

I am not yet 2-months out from neck surgery to remove lymph nodes (just on one side). While I do have scars and some swelling/puffiness, I do not think of it as "disfiguring" and it is not that bad.

I had my chin split open and jaw sawed in half so the most obvious scar runs down from my lip to my chin, and from a temporary tracheotomy. The scars from the lymph nodes runs in what my surgeon described as a Lazy Y, from underneath my ear, under my jaw line and down my neck to one side. The scars under the jaw are somewhat hidden.

The week by week improvement of the scar appearance is substantial. I do admit to wearing turtlenecks and scarves to cover it up when I go out (and am glad that it is fall/winter). I have young school age kids and frequently other kids will stand very close to me and stare - I think there are just curious (I also talk funny because 1/2 my tongue was removed).

Because it is not on my face I don't think of it as disfiguring and it really doesn't bother me that much. I view it as battle scars because I HAVE been through a lot and I'm proud of what I have survived.

I want to be here and to live. The scars and change of appearance are a minor trade off.

The lymph node removal will remove any problem areas or spread of cancer and by lab anaylsis will give your medical team a much better picture.

Waiting is so hard, especially when you don't have specific answers, your mind can go through so many 'what if...'s. Good luck with what's ahead,
michelle