Cathy,
I was presented with the same option: Face a 12 hour surgery with disfigurement, pectoral flap, lifetime swallowing problems and increased morbidity and radiation anyway or just radiation and chemo which the doctors stated would have the same statistical outcome. My head and neck surgeon recommended against the surgery. I completed treatment 42 days ago and am doing ok. The tumor completely melted away and to date no trace of anything has shown up on the CT's or exams I've been given. Of course only time will tell. I did a lot of research and asked a lot of questions before I made my decision to go ahead with the treatment plan. Plus I lobbied to be treated at UCSF, pioneers in the type of IMRT radiation therapy that I had. My advice to you is learn as much as you can and make the decision
based on carefully weighing the pro's and con's of all your options.

PS: Radiation was a lot harder than I thought it would be and I'm still suffering a little from it and I use a Waterpik and find it very useful. I had to start using floss (very carefully) again when I started getting repeated outbreaks of thrush.