Hi Jolie,

First, I have to tell you that caregivers are special people in my opinion. I believe the whole experience is just as hard on the caregiver as the patient (if not harder on a stress level measure)
Second, I will say my doctor did a neck disection to look for the cancel site that did not show on ct scans. It turned out to be my left tonsil, but he did look for it and felt that was very important...
And third is that the foods I lived on were mashed potatoes, eggs, pudding cups, cream soups, malts at first then they were too cold. But the secret was Cheesecake Factory Plain Cheesecake. Bought at Sam's Whoesale...My husband would leave a slice on the counter to room temp and I ate everything but the crust. 500 calories a slice. Pretty good.
I wish you both luck, and please take Brians' advise and get a second opinion from an ENT not associated with your current doctor.
Take care,
Dinah