Hi, Baron50 wife, this is Packer 66`s wife.........I know what you mean about handling all this...yesterday, I dragged my husband to the ER, with blood running out of his ear, last week was salivary fistulas, I`m now draining twice a day, we`re looking at 3rd surgery soon..........sometimes I wish a magic fairy would come along and take over.........I don`t have the option of just throwing up my hands, and say I quit......I know how lonely you truly feel about the whole thing, because you try to keep the thoughts and fear away from your husband, but you truly do have the strength within yourself to do what needs to be done.......believe me, I`ve found that out for myself..........I can`t say it`s ever going to get easier, but the strength is there, within you........believe that.........Many Prayers, your way